Gone from Your Thoughts
by aycee-san
Summary: England came to visit America, but gets in a fatal crash and sent to the hospital. When he wakes up, he forgets all the memories that he had with America. Yet something is causing England to forget America, and the nations have to help him get them back. Rated T because of swearing and slight yaoi in other chapters.
1. Chapter 1

"So where are we going, America?" England stood close to America as they walked through the misty streets.

"Somewhere, but it's a surprise Iggy!" America yelled back at him, his hands inside his pockets, his breath forming under his mouth.

They passed through several buildings,stores, and other 'restaurants' as they walked. England doesn't see America's country a lot anymore, so he decided to visit and travel to Chicago with America to give a tour.

Too bad that America was bad at giving tours. England could see the bright lights in the city surrounded by snow falling from the sky. It was very cold there in Chicago, but England didn't seem to mind, as well as America.

"Are we almost there? It's starting to get late you git," England ruined the silence as they walked the cracked and weathered concrete.

"Yeah, but I know you'll like it!" America grinned and felt confident and sure he would make England surprised at what he would show him.

"Guess it better be, it's starting to get really cold out here." England hugged himself as the wind started to blow and snow kept on falling on the two nations.

America replied back with only a smile, and looked at the scenery around them. Until America suddenly stopped walking and England seemed a bit confused.

"What the bloody hell are you doing America? Did you find the place we were going to? Or did you just get hungry again?"

America snapped out from his trance and looked back at England.

"Nothing, but I need to get something from that store over there,"

America began to walk in another direction and England also followed as well, but America soon stopped him.

"Stay here, it's for the surprise that I'm taking you to." America smiled and ran off to the store while England stayed on the other side of the road.

"I'll be right back!" America yelled out and left his sight.

England stood there in the freezing cold as he waited for America. He crossed his arms and tried to warm himself before he could freeze to death.

_Where is that bloody wanker? He better not be buying more snacks or food or something __like that in there._

England continued to wait for America but started to grow impatient as each minute passed. It has already been five minutes in the store, what exactly would America be buying at this time?

England had enough of it, he was freezing out here in this weather and wanted to know what America was doing.

He walked towards the small store, storming off until he heard a loud truck horn coming his way.

England turned to the direction the horn was coming from and barely had time to react.

His eyes widened and it was like he was frozen in time, like the snow falling froze him at that spot.

The horn got louder as the truck came closer, England stood there expecting the impact drawing near.

He heard the sound of an elevator opening from the direction of the store.

"Iggy! Sorry that it took a while it's just that-" America opened his eyes in time to see England before he was going to be hit.

"England! Get out of the road!" America shouted as loud as he could, but England was still stunned from the truck coming near.

America ran into the street, but...

_It was already too late._

The scene was gruesome, blood splattered and surrounding England, and even got it on America's clothes. One of his arms looked bent out of place, and it looked like he wasn't breathing.

America quickly dialed 9-1-1 on his phone and desperately waited for someone to pick up. Tears poured down his face as it mixed with the blood on the concrete.

"America?" England whispered so weakly yet America came forward to hear his voice. He held England's hand as America began to sob over England's crumbled body.

"England, stay with me here, just don't die on me, please, just do that for me." America could barely contain the tears dropping on England's cheeks.

England couldn't breathe any longer, his body was in this mess, and his vision started to form black spots around him. He wasn't able to see America anymore.

"England, please," His sobs were broken as he heard ambulance sirens coming from the distance.

England wanted to respond, but slowly fell into unconsciousness.

_England, don't go..._

Everything went pitch black.

* * *

_It was dark, I couldn't see a single thing, just pure darkness._

_I felt numb inside, like I couldn't feel my body when I walked or moved._

_Even closing my eyes seemed to give me more light than what was around me, I could see your face and your smile._

_But every time I tried to see your face again, my mind erases you from my mind. I couldn't reach you even if I tried._

_I kept waiting for something to happen, waiting for you to appear and for me to return to the real world with you._

_It didn't happen. _

_I was surrounded by darkness every minute of every hour of every day. Who knew how long I was in here?_

_Still, I could hear your voice, as well for other nations and the nurses and doctors. You sounded so worried for me, staying by my side even when the doctors told you to leave. _

_I could hear your sobs and you pleading for me to come back, waiting for me to answer to you. _

_Everyday those sobs and noises that I would hear would get louder every time I heard them._

_Hearing you was the light I needed to see through this darkness. Hearing your voice made me smile and wanting to see you again._

_Until I saw the light, I could see in the darkness, and I went towards the light shining through._

_It was bright and yet I continued to run to the light to see where it came from._

_I ran constantly until I reached the end, I didn't stop, I wanted to see you again._

_I reached out for your voice, reached for your smile. _

_And the darkness devoured me once more. _

* * *

England opened his eyes to find himself in a hospital bed, and could hear the sounds from the machines beside his bed.

He looked around to see if anyone was in the room, but he was all alone except for the surveillance camera following his every move.

"_He's awake?!"_ England heard a voice coming from across the hallway.

_Is he talking about me? _

He could hear the sound of footsteps running through the hallway and the door slammed open.

He found a man who looked very familiar to him. He could see the tears forming in his blue eyes, and forced a smile as he came towards England.

"England, I'm so glad you're awake," he whispered to him as tears fell down his face.

"I... what happened?" England could barely speak as his hand was grabbed by the mysterious an next to him.

"You were hit by a truck, England, and you were unconscious for about a month. But you're awake now."

England's eyes widened, but he couldn't recognize the man before him. Who was this person on his bedside?

"Angleterre? You're awake!"

England looked at the doorway to see another man, but he know automatically who he was.

"France? What are you doing here?" England seemed to wake up fro his small trance. It was strange to see France here and be worried about England's safety.

"Well, after America here called me immediately after the crash, I came here as quickly as possible. Many countries came to see how you were doing and America came each and every single day to see if you would wake up." France smiled and looked towards America.

"Yeah, I was so scared about you because on that day I was going to-"

England stopped America for a moment. He didn't understand why England stopped him.

"France," England whispered to him and looked back at America.

"Oui, England?" France kept a smile on his face even though he was far concerned.

"Who is the person sitting next to me?"

Both France and America gasped at what he said.

"It's America of course! Who else would it be?" France explained to England, but he started to become worried.

"I'm sorry, but I have no idea who _America _is,"

_Who is this America? Am I supposed to know who he is?_

America began to shudder and grabbed England by his shoulders, England didn't understand why the person in front of him was shaking him.

"England, it's me. It's me, America, you have to remember that right?" England could see the boy sobbing as he held on to his shoulders.

England grabbed his hands off from him and said straight to his pale face,

"I don't remember you, I don't know who you are."

America collapsed to the floor and cried out broken sobs while England can only stare.

* * *

**Finished with the intro! This will be my first story divided into chapters and I'm not so sure how I'm able to make cliffhangers later in the future.**

**Please favorite and review because that would make me full of joy! **

**I'll try to post new chapters every now and then...**

**I do not and will never own Hetalia.**


	2. Chapter 2

"You mean to tell me that England lost _every_ single memory with America?"

France nodded as he told the rest of the countries during the G8 conference. Everyone was quite shocked, others were surprised that only America was wiped out from his memory. America sat at the far end trying to ignore all the conversations going on in the meeting.

"Strange, but what if England gets all of his memories back soon? The amnesia shouldn't last that long anyways aru," China spoke through all the commotion so that the other countries were able to hear him.

"That is a possibility, but England only forgot _one _country. I wouldn't be surprised if he never remembered his past of America." Japan replied back to China with a concerned look on his face.

"Still, he can't forget America," France said broadly, all the countries looking back at him,"out of all the countries, he just _can't _forget America." France sat back down and could feel sadness in America. Out of every country that England had to forget, America was the one.

"Well, we should wait it out for a while to see if England regains his memories once more, da? maybe spending tie with America could work." Russia said with a creepy smile upon his face.

Many countries nodded with agreement while others would only stare.

"Ve, that sounds like a great idea Russia!" Italy yelled out with enthusiasm to Russia and other countries couldn't help but smile.

"I agree with him as well, but when do you know that we're able to meet England again?" Germany directed back to France as he looked at him with tense eyes.

"Not sure, but Angleterre seems to be doing better since the crash," France looked back at America to see him slouched in his chair and hugging his legs.

France could only sigh deeply. "If we're lucky, then maybe this week, but at the latest, a month."

"A month, it's a bit long, but it's what he needs to get better." Japan spoke in a low voice, and could only feel worried for how America is handling all of this.

"Do you think that you should... you know aru..." China pointed silently to America and the countries watched as America sat in his chair not saying a single word.

"Not yet, but we should all take care of America from on now until England gets his memories back." Germany spoke and told the rest of the countries there.

All the countries could only feel pity for what America was going through. Japan decided to step forward and console with America.

"America-san? May I have a talk with you?" Japan tried to speak as politely and calmly to America, making sure that America wouldn't refuse to speak to him.

America looked back at Japan. There was no tears on his eyes but there was no sign of joy to be found, there was only sorrow and sadness.

"Sure, why not Japan?" America whispered back and soon the other countries came closer to hear the conversation.

Japan forced on a slight smile to cheer up America. "I know for sure that I don't know what you're going through, but I know that you're going to see him again and that he might remember you once again."

America's eyes started to tear up but blinked them away so that Japan wouldn't have to see him like this.

"Yeah, I guess you're right but," America noticed the other countries trying to hear what he said, but quickly moved back so he could respond to Japan. "But, everything that I've done with him, is now long gone, even the-" America stopped himself before he could finish the thought.

America could only stare blankly at the ground beneath him.

_He couldn't have forgotten the war, right? _

"I know what you're saying, and don't worry, the memories should come back." Japan began to walk away until America grabbed his arm. Japan looked back to see tears fall from his blue eyes.

"What if he doesn't remember? If he forgets everything about me?" Japan moved his hand away from his arm. The other countries looked at Japan trying to comfort America and got closer each second.

"If England really does forget," he looked to see the countries watching them with every move. He turned back to America and whispered to him.

"Then make new memories with him, he may have forgotten his past with you but that doesn't mean he'll forget the future. You'll be able to meet each other again but it will take a while for England to fully be connected to you in some way."

America felt tears flow down his cheeks and tried to smile in front of Japan.

"Thanks Japan, it really helps me to know that I could still see England again." The rest of the countries were surprised since they haven't seen America smile since England woke from consciousness. Well, before he found out what happened to him.

"Da, we should check up on England to make sure he's alright, but do you think that we should bring you as well?" Russia looked back at America, his cold eyes seemed to go through his crying blue eyes.

"I don't know, but if America was to go, I think one of us should be in the room as well aru." America looked down to see his tears fall after what China and Russia said.

_Another person in the room if I go? Why is that such a problem? _

"Why would there be another person in the room? I can be able to talk to England on my own, so why not-"

"It's because you can affect how he is like towards you, that's all America," Japan spoke and all America could do was stare from all the confusion.

"England is not the same person as always to you right now, so you need to give him some time before you can see him personally."

America groaned at the fact he couldn't talk to England on his own.

"Don't worry, we should be seeing him soon!" Italy tried to sound joyous and enthusiastic for him, but failed to bring up a smile.

America stood up from his seat and began to walk slowly to the door. The countries watched but didn't bother to stop him.

"America-san? You don't want to check on England with us?" Japan yelled out before America could close the door behind him. He looked back with a cold look in his eyes, and let a frown take over his face.

"Talk to him before me, tell him about me, then I'll go and see him." America closed the door leaving the countries in the conference room thinking about what to do when they see England again.

"Guess we should go check on him, aru." China interrupted the silence that filled the room.

"Oui, we should leave." France started to head for the door with the other countries following one by one.

* * *

"Guess I feel better than before, but my body still hurts all around." England lied on his hospital bed as the other countries surrounded around him.

"That sounds good, but does he still remember Ameri-" Italy blurted out but Germany quickly covered his mouth before he could ask. England watched as Germany muttered unintelligible words to Italy and looked back at France.

"I was meaning to ask you, who is this _America _you're speaking of? And why was he sobbing when he met me? I don't know who that wanker was, but who is he?"

All of the countries became silent and waited for anyone to answer. Others looked at France while he looked at Japan. Japan glared at France and let out a sigh.

England looked confused as the countries in front of him looked around for someone to answer.

"Is something the matter? You all look worried," England broke the silence in the room, still waiting for someone to speak up.

"England, America is not just a random stranger, you know him very well actually." Japan finally answered his question and looked back to see England wide-eyed from his response.

"I have no idea what the hell you're talking about, if I knew him then I would remember him. But I don't, doesn't that explain it much?" England convinced them that he didn't know who America was, but the countries started to look more startled by what he said.

"No, Japan is right, but it seems that you don't have any memory left with him anymore," Germany tried to speak calmly to England but saw how England started to shake in his bed.

_No memory of him anymore? Who is this bloody America? Why are they making such a big deal about him? _

"Angleterre, he..." England looked back at France to see he had a look of concern sketched on his face. France began to speak while England was knocked out from his trance.

"America, he was the person who you took care of as a child,"

At that moment, numerous feelings and thoughts went off in England's head.

_Took care of him when he was a child? But, I don't remember seeing him, I don't remember anything about America, and why should I?_

"But I don't remember taking care of a child like him, I have no clue about who he is for hell's sake!" England shouted but calmed down quickly as he thought everything out through.

"England, we know how you would surprised by this, but we think that you should see America again, maybe you could remember him then," Japan held a smooth tone to his voice, causing England to relax and to think thoroughly about all of this.

"Meet him?" England met with Japan's eyes and felt surprised that he considered for them two to meet. "I'm not sure, it would feel a little uncomfortable for us two to have a conversation together."

"I agree, but it's best if you can talk with him aru. Another one of us will be there when you see him aru." England looked at China to see a slight smile grow on his face.

England only sighed, headaches beginning to form and exhaustion from everything that was going on.

"We should leave now, leave him to rest da?" Russia raised his childlike voice around the room, and stood up while others began to follow.

Japan and France stopped before they left the room, taking one look back at England before they left.

"Wait," England shouted before the door closed. France opened back the door to see what England needed. "So,when am I going to see him?"

France smiled."Soon mon ami, we'll tell you when he does," He grabbed the doorknob and shut the door, leaving England alone in the room.

_Who are you? Do you really matter that much in my life? _

_Well, according to the other countries, I guess you really are a part of my life._

England began to rest and slowly drifted to sleep.

"Until we meet,America,until we meet,"

* * *

**Finished with another chapter! I don't think this is as good as the first chapter, but I'm glad it's finished.**

**Please review and favorite and you would make me such a happy person!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**


	3. Chapter 3

"I don't know, what should I say to him?" America walked through the narrow corridor as France stood by his side. England was still in the hospital, but he would soon leave in the next few days.

"I'm not too sure America, but I know he wants to meet you," France kept his hands in his pockets as he guided America to England's room. America watched as he passed through other patients' rooms where they were sleeping or already dead with someone crying by their side.

"Well, what do you think he might ask?" America twiddled his thumbs as they walked, waiting for an answer from France.

"I don't really know. He might ask more about you or anything having to do with his past with you." France trailed off as they started to approach the room. America stopped to take a breath before he entered the room.

_I wonder if you're still there Iggy._

France turned the doorknob to see England resting softly in his bed, no hint of a smile when America walked in.

"Angleterre! You must feel better after all this time oui?" France chimed in to see if England would react, but as always, he didn't.

"Sure, I'll be out of here within a few days, hopefully by then I could just rest or be alone for the time being."England reached his hand out for a cup of tea sitting on the drawer beside him, careful to not drop or spill any because of his weak arms.

"Great, we'll do that for you, but I know you wanted to see-"

"Yeah, I _did _wanted to see him." England interrupted him before he could have the chance to introduce the nation 'America' right next to him. He could see how America stood there quietly and looked like he could scream out from all the impatience going on in the room.

"Well, what do you want to talk to him about?" France looked worried as he tried to speak to England without having to include America into it.

"Oh, just a few things, but first,"

England pointed to the door and looked straight at France.

America's eyes widened as he ordered France to leave the room. He couldn't believe that England would just tell him that he couldn't hear the conversation they were about to have. Slowly, his shock increased as he suddenly realized what this all meant. He was going to be alone with England, someone who forgot every single moment together, every tragedy, every moment of happiness, of sadness, of anger, and even the other countries believed that he couldn't talk to England alone. He regretted the decision England made for France to leave.

"Angleterre, I don't think that is such a good idea-"

_"Out."_ He motioned the path to the door as France began to shake and stood very slowly. France looked to see America stare with surprised eyes and walked towards him with a frightened look.

"France, I don't know if I could talk to him alone when he's like..._this._" America tried to whisper as softly as he could so England wouldn't be able to hear, but it seemed like he could hear everything that is going on.

"Me either, I'll have to tell the other countries as well, maybe have a meeting about this tomorrow, but you have to make sure you answer all of his questions. You got that?" America quickly nodded as France started to head out the door. Before he had shut the door, he let out a small nod with an uneasy smile, and the door closed.

_Now it's only me and you England._

He stood there watching England sip his tea and took close looks at the nation standing before him. There was a long moment of silence as the two observed each other, but seemed to do others no good.

England finally broke the silence in the room. "So _you're_ the country of America that everybody has been going on about. Am I correct?"

America took a few breaths before he could answer. He tried to calm himself down after France had left, but it wasn't helping him at all.

"Yeah, I'm America." He spoke his fairly simple answer as he continued to watch England drink his tea. He set his cup on the cabinet, ready to start a long conversation with the man in front of him.

"Alright, but tell me more," America was confused, his lack of understanding made England chuckle under his breath. "Just tell me more about yourself, that's all." It was a very simple question, but America knew he could give the wrong answer anytime.

"About me? Well, I guess I would think of myself as the hero, someone who loves eating fast food, stuff along that."

England glared his eyes at him and his mouth formed a frown on his face.

"Not the answer you wanted to hear?" America glared back at England, seeing that his green eyes widened by his words.

"Then here's your real answer. Most of the other countries would call me as fat, obnoxious,annoying,immature,irresponsible,or all of the above. _You _however would call me all of those things, but you would also use _git,wanker,bloody hell,_ anything else like that." America watched as England's eyes were glued on a nation who directly told what everyone else thinks about him, and how he would describe this nation.

England tried to comprehend everything that he had just said.

_He knew how I would describe people even though I have never met him. Is he trying to pull some sort of trick on me? Is this 'America' trying to fool me? _

"You answered my question very well, thanks for that." No smile appeared, but he could look at America normally like he would with other countries.

"Guess so, since I do know who you are," England wasn't shocked anymore by the fact everyone was agreeing that America knew who he was and that he has been part of England's life.

"Good for you. Next question, what happened?"

"What do you mean by 'what happened?'"

"What happened before I got here? The accident, what exactly happened?"

America knew why he left England in the first place to the store, he was going to buy a bouquet of roses, so that he could present to England when they reached their destination. But England thought that he was buying food or any type of snack.

"You were visiting me here and we were going to this place, I forgot so don't ask,"America remembered where they were going. They were just going to a small park. Didn't seem much, but it was the perfect time to spend time with England and to be together on a cold winter night.

Only that didn't happen.

"I stopped by a store to get something very quick, just to enjoy on where we were going. I might have been in there a little too long, and you grew impatient after a while and the bitter cold didn't do you any good. When I finally exited the store, I found you in the middle of the street, standing so still as a truck came towards you."

England was surprised to see the look of emotion on America's face.

"I didn't know what to do. I called out for you but by the time I did, it was already too late."

America stopped for a moment to blink back tears forming in his eyes. He didn't want to remember the incident.

"Before I knew it, all I could see was red. Everything around you was stained blood. You were covered in blood. I couldn't stand to see you like that." America was still trying to force back tears and England had his mouth wide open.

"That's not true, I remember getting hit by a truck, but I don't think I saw someone beside me."

That statement ran through America thoughts and a sudden headache was forming.

"I know I was there, I was the one who told the other nations that you were hit! How else do you think they found out?"

England opened his eyes wide as he fully realized what this meant.

_How did the other countries find out? I thought it was because I was missing for a few days then they figured it out. But this nation upon me told them? _

"I thought something different happened. Anything else?" He looked back to see America shaking his head with a fierce look on him.

"You really don't remember anything do you?"

"No, but what should I remember? I don't know about us two. So what makes us being apart so crucial? What happened to us before the incident?"

"Many things happened, some stuff that I don't want to talk about and stuff that I don't want to remember." America stood there twiddling his thumbs and glared at England for his answer.

"Prove it to me then, something that shouldn't forget. Go ahead."

America stared at the ground. If he told him about what happened all those years ago, would it change how England is like to him now? Was it worth the risk?

"Bloody git," America looked back to see England with a cruel smile. "You can't think of one, because you know that nothing special happened with us. There is nothing between us, and you know that. Do you see how-"

"We had a war against each other," America shouted through England's response. He stopped his cruel chuckle and listened to America once more.

"We did? But I should..." His words trailed off as he continued to look at America with wide eyes.

"Yeah, you don't remember. We had a war, and _I defeated you."_

England tried to stay calm but he had no choice but to be shocked. How could he forget a war? And with someone he lost to?

"It changed everything between us, that's why many countries were shocked to see that you didn't remember anything that had to do with me."

England sat in his hospital bed still in a trance, waiting for an explanation about all of this.

"A war. Tell me more."

* * *

**Finished with another chapter! I think this one is a little better then the second chapter and I'm happy with that!**

**Please favorite and review!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me!**


	4. Chapter 4

"He's in there _alone _with England aru?!" France kept the phone to his ears even though all he heard was shouts and complaints coming from China.

"Oui, England ordered me out of the room, I don't know what they'll be talking about in there!" France stood against the wall trying to make out what was going on the other side of the phone.

"Can you hear anything through the door aru?" He held the phone down and leaned near the door and turned his head to hear what was going on. All he could hear was slight mumbles and couldn't make out what they were saying.

"Non, it's difficult to hear. Sorry,"

"Don't worry," a different voice appeared from the other line of the phone. "Let them continue on, don't disturb them unless it is an emergency." Japan's voice was calm despite the situation they were in.

"Japan, who knows what they may be talking about! For all we know, America can be telling England about the..." France couldn't finish the thought.

"Just keep a close eye on what they're talking about, if they start to argue, you might as well see what they're up to." Japan tried to smooth down France, luckily that it was working.

"Oui, I shall talk to you soon," he smiled was a sigh of relief escaping his lips.

"Sayonara, France." the phone was cut off leaving France to try and hear the conversation between England and America.

* * *

"You don't remember anything about a _war? _You have to at least remember the colonies and acts you put on me," America stood with his arms crossed as he stood next to England's bed.

"I _should _be able to remember a war with someone who defeated me and my troops, who why can't I?" England questioned the thought of forgetting the war.

"_I don't know. _I can I least tell you what happened before and during the war. Do you know about having a war against France back then?"

England darted his eyes to the cup of tea he was holding. He _did_ remember the war against France. It was him against the Indians yet he still had managed to beat him. He began to remember that glorious moment when he finally kicked France's ass, and then...

He didn't remember what happened next.

Everything after that moment was suddenly gone. Erased from his mind for who knows how long.

"I do, but I don't... I don't remember anything after that point," America's eyes widened as England began to shake and the sound of his teacup glass clicking as he trembled.

"England! Just calm down!" America reached out his arm to stop England from shaking. He gently held his hand to assure him until he stopped.

At that moment the world began to shift around him.

_"England! Can you read me a bedtime story please?"_

England looked out and could see a slight image in the distance. It was hard to make out, but it slowly came clear to him and could see what was going on in the picture.

_"Sure America, I'll come by your bed in just a moment okay?" _

_Is this my voice? _

England watched himself holding a quite large storybook and heading of to another room. He headed upstairs in a household that seemed familiar to him. He watched himself open a door which he could see a small child underneath the blankets.

The child was very small indeed, even adorable to point out. He had bright blue eyes and golden hair that can be easily recognized with the strange curl sticking out.

England gasped as he realized who this boy was. The boy who he was taking care of.

It was America. The nation who had been convincing him that he knew him.

_No, this doesn't make any sense. _

The image began to fade but England continued to reach back for it.

"No! I have to know! I need to see what happens!"

"See what? England you need to snap out of it! Just relax!"

England could hear his voice again, his head spinning from what he had just witnessed.

_I just saw you. I saw you as a child, and I was taking care of you. But I don't remember that. I don't remember seeing or doing anything like that in my entire life. How is this possible? _

"I-I-I don't u-understand,"

"England, just calm down or the nurses will hear!" America held him down by his arms and protested him to stop shaking. He was only shaking more and making the situation worse.

"England! Shut up!" England could feel a burn of pain spreading through his cheek and started to snap out from all the shaking.

"What the fuck was that for you bloody git?!"

"I had to! You were starting to panic! What else was I supposed to do?!" The look of concern washed over America's face as he continued to watch England. He looked to see a bright red spot that covered almost the entirety of his cheek.

"Sorry, I didn't-"

"No, _I _am sorry. I guess if I were in the same situation that you were in I wouldn't have known what to do." England's voice was still shaky from what he had just witnessed. America was trying to put everything together.

_What was England talking about when he needed to know what happens next?_

_Why did he start to freak out all of a sudden? _

_What went on with him for the pat few seconds?_

America rubbed his hand against his forehead, not receiving an answer to any of the questions he had asked.

"America? Are you alright in there?" He turned around to hear quiet poundings on the door behind him, hearing France's voice almost faint from the lack of sound.

"Yeah! Everything's good!" America replied back hoping that France won't come in to see England in this state.

"Good? What do you mean by 'good'? You slapped me on the cheek and it still hurts! Also I am still confused by everything that is going on! Why don't you just realize that I don't remember you?" he shouted but he looked exhausted as if he were to pass out from many things going on at once._  
_

"I won't accept that. No, I won't. Even the other countries won't accept that."

England could barely hold it all in. Tears started to fall and rush down his ruby-red cheek, enough for America to notice them.

"England..." America reached out to wipe his tears away, but England backed off. He tried as gently as he can to get closer, to ensure that England was safe.

When America touched the side of his cheek, he could feel its warmness spread across his skin, and could feel the salty tears drift away from his palm.

At that moment, England didn't see America anymore. Beside him as his replacement was the small child.

He watched his bright blue eyes blink back tears and slowly began to drift off to sleep.

_"England..." _the boy whispered as England began to close his eyes.

Pure blackness swallowed him and the light was out from his reach.

He was alone once again.

* * *

**Finished with another chapter! I didn't really like the way this chapter turned out, but I'm just glad that I was able to finish it. I'm thinking of writing a Gerita oneshot but I'm still not sure whether or not I should do it.**

**Please favorite and review and I shall give you a brofist (to the face)!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**


	5. Chapter 5

England opened his eyes to be blinded by pure white light. It was strange when he had woken up to feel no pain on his body, nor on his cheek.

_Where am I?_

He pushed himself off from the ground and looked around to see if the doctors might have transferred him to a different room, or to see if America was next to him.

Instead, he found no walls, no doors, no windows, it even felt like England was walking on air when he looked down.

He continued to look for any way he could escape, but there was no place to start at and there was no sight of anybody as he looked around.

"Hello? Anybody here? America?" he didn't feel right calling out his name, but he was probably the only person he could search for at the moment.

The whiteness only made England's nervousness grow stronger by the moment, he felt like he was about to have a panic attack and die alone in this place.

Until he widened at the thought that went through his mind.

_Am I already dead? Is this heaven? _

He stopped. It couldn't be.

"No, this is more of a nightmare to me than heaven, guess I might be in hell." he said to himself as he searched for a sight of anyone, even America.

_God, why don't I remember you? I just saw myself taking care of you when you were a child. _

"This doesn't make any sense! Where the hell am I? How am I going to get out!?"

_"Then why don't you just remember him already?"_

England tensed up when he heard his own voice say those words. He turned around to see himself, but he was a complete wreck. He could see that his other self was limping and walking very slowly to him. His clothes were ripped and covered with spots of blood. His arm looked bent out of place and holding on with his bloody hand. He had slightly dark bags under his eyes and his emerald eyes was stained with tears and blood. He could barely look at himself like that, the gruesome sight of his own reflection almost caused him to puke.

"What the bloody hell is wrong with you?! Why am I- I mean,why are _you_ like that?" he screamed out to the other England, but shielded his eyes to keep his sight away from him.

He didn't reply. England waited for a response, and tears came pouring down his red cheeks.

"Answer me! Just say something you git!" He was practically pleading at this point. He watched as himself moved towards him stretching his arm out to touch England.

"You don't remember him. You can't even remember yourself. Take one look at me, and tell me who I am." his voice was normal, calm and serene, but it sounded cruel and menacing with every word he said.

England looked up, and his eyes widened at the very sight. All the blood was gone, his clothes were free of any holes or marks. His arms were in the right position and he suddenly looked fierce and powerful over England's shaking body.

"How did you-" he began to question but his other half clamped his hand over his mouth. England struggled to speak but no prevail.

"I asked a simple question. Guess you didn't listen, so I'll say it again. Take one look at me and tell me who I am."

England stared at him and looked at his features. I was him, it was like looking at your reflection from a mirror. There was really no difference in appearance, but there was something off about his other self.

"You're me. But how did you-" he clamped his hand again over his mouth, but removed it after a few seconds.

"You're almost right. Think about when you first saw me, maybe you'll get it right," his reflection looked at him with cold eyes, they seemed darker than they usually are.

He thought about what he saw earlier, himself covered in dark blood, a tired look on his face, his body bent in the wrong direction. He found the answer after a moment.

"That's how I was after the-"

"You're right, but it seems like you're forgetting a lot about it. Actually, you're forgetting yourself lately." He recognized his voice but it felt so stern and controlling that he couldn't believe that the person talking to him _was_ him.

"Myself? I haven't forgotten anything! And don't you dare tell me about that git America, I've had enough of everyone telling me that I know who America is and how he is some important person in my life. Hell, don't even tell me you agree with the other countries." His eyes ran out of tears and started to yell back at himself. Even the person before him looked somewhat shocked.

"Well it isn't me who's forgetting him, it's you. Not my fault you don't remember him anymore." His eyes darted to England's clenched fists, almost as white as the walls around them.

"Who _are _you really? I know you're me, but I feel like there's something off with you. And it seems like you, or to put it in the correct terms, _I, _know who that git America is." England got himself up from the ground and stood up as formally as he could. His mouth seemed dry when he waited for his other self to speak.

"I'm a part of you. To be a lot more clear, I'm your memories, I'm your past. That's why I looked like I was after the accident earlier. You remember the accident differently than me. In fact, you remember everything in your life differently than me."

England paused for a moment to comprehend everything that his own reflection had told him. He didn't fully understand why his past was standing there before him and telling him that he was apart of him. If he _was _England's memories, why isn't he returning back to England so that he could remember his past with America and everything would be like it was before the accident? His head began to spin with all the unanswered questions and thoughts floating around.

"I am you, you do realize that I know what you're thinking every second. Don't think that I can't hear what you're saying or thinking." England tensed up from his words. He should've realized that he was him after all.

"I don't understand, if you're my memories, why aren't you with me after the accident? If seemed like you just broke apart from me," He looked back at him to see that his head was down and looking down at the ground.

"Not really, I'm still there with you, but something is blocking me away. I'm trapped inside your mind and it is keeping me from reminding you of your past. That's why you don't remember America or anything having to do with him."

_Wait, it doesn't make any sense. _

"What is this 'something' that is keeping you from remembering my past, and why do I only forget America and not the other countries? You did say that you are my memories of _everyone _and everything, so why only him?" England questioned himself and was impatiently waiting for an answer.

"This 'something', is _you. _You're keeping yourself from remembering America, not bothering to forget the other countries. I'm not fully trapped, but every memory that you have had with America is stuck there somewhere in your mind. Like I said before, not my fault. It's yours."

"N-n-no, that's impossible, why would I choose to forget America? I would never do that to him!" England began to scream as loud as he can, creating an echo surrounding the room.

"I don't know, but earlier, you had the memory of yourself taking care of America as a child. Somehow you stopped blocking me, I was able to give you that memory with ease. I don't know how you did it, but after you witnessed the memory again, I got blocked again."

England began to tremble at the very thought. He freed his past self was a small moment, a moment enough to share a distant memory from when he was with a younger America. His past self noticed that he was shaking and reached out to grab his arm. England continued to shake but was starting to calm down as time passed.

"Don't worry, if you can release me for a small moment, you could do it again for a longer time. Just don't panic alright?" He tried to calm England down and luckily it seemed to work. He let go of his arm and began to walk away from him. England noticed him before he disappeared into the white mist around them. Suddenly England felt dizzy and tired all of a sudden. He called out for himself before he was out of his sight.

"Wait! Where are you going?" England shouted weakly but it was enough for his other self to hear.

"You're waking up. You shouldn't tell America about this just yet. Spend time with him and maybe I won't be trapped anymore. We'll see each other again soon. Just try to remember him." he replied with a slight smile before he was gone into the mist.

England closed his eyes as the pure white walls became dark and pain surfaced him again.

_I have to remember you now America, I have to._

The thought floated around him before he drifted off to a deep and dark sleep.

* * *

**Another chapter finished! I originally wasn't going to make the other self of England his memories, just someone else like his conscience or whatever. If you remember from the beginning when England was trapped in the darkness and when he was in his coma, it was probably England's memories keeping England from remembering who America was. **

**Just a thought that I was thinking when I was writing this chapter...**

**I might use a bit of human names in the next chapter or two, just to say for anyone who's reading.**

**Please favorite and review and you will make me a happy person!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**

**But if it did... **


	6. Chapter 6

England woke up from his sleep laying on the same hospital bed and the familiar headache blazing in his skull. It took him a while for him to take in everything that had just went on with his past self with the occurring throbs in his head and the sense of dizziness around him.

"Ve~ you're waking up England! What do I do? Should I get Germany? I-I-I don't know what to-" England turned around to hear Italy's panicking voice from the corner of the room.

_Why is he here? Shouldn't it be America? What about France or Japan? This is strange, considering putting the least trustworthy nation to watch over me._

"It's alright Italy, you didn't do anything wrong. Do you know where the other nations are? And if you don't mind answering, did you _choose _to take watch or was it _decided_ for you?" England spoke in a faint yet stern tone, letting Italy to settle down and walk slowly towards England.

"Oh, the other countries were all talking about something that had to do with you and... uh, never mind. They told me to stay in the room so that I could keep watch." Italy ended his sentence with a wide smile. England was somewhat stunned to see him still smile in a situation like this, but he figured it was a way to cheer him up.

"Makes sense, and you don't have to hide anything about America to me. I'm fine with you saying his name." He could see Italy remove the tense from his body and let out a small laugh.

"Grazie~ England. But maybe I should go tell the other countries that you are awake now," Italy headed for the door and was about to turn the doorknob.

"Italy, when you see them, say that I need to have a word with France and Japan. And say that it might take a while." England set his eyes on Italy to see a worried and nervous look set on his face.

"Si, England. I-I'll tell t-t-them," His own body seemed to shake from the way England spoke. It was how he would normally speak but it was like something cruel went into his throat.

Italy closed the door behind him slowly, and ran off to find the other countries.

* * *

America stood with his arms crossed as he listened to the continuous rants and complaints that were thrown at him by the other countries.

_"Why__ in hell would you speak of the war to him?"_

_"Thanks to you he passed out!"_

_"I knew it was a bad idea for you to even enter the same room with England, aru."_

_"Don't worry, I think I should punish him later, da?"_

_"Maybe he won't think of you the same anymore, America-san. I'm sorry to say that."_

America kept a straight face as each of the countries continued to argue and shout at him. It was so difficult for him to look strong and for him to seem like he didn't care, but all he wanted to do was cry his eyes out and wish for England to forgive him for what he did.

He was already at the verge of tears, and felt like he could scream out any second now for the nations to just shut up and listen. He looked down to where his face was out of sight, the other countries not bothering to see if he was alright or if he was feeling down.

_Stop._

_I don't want to hear you yelling at me anymore._

_Just stop._

_Stop._

_Stop._

_"Stop it! Just stop yelling at me!" _America raised his arms to his head and gritted his teeth as fresh tears started to pour down his cheeks. The countries stopped their shouting in an instant, watching as America collapsed to the ground with his arms still covering his wet face.

"I-I-I had to tell him. When I tried to tell him about the war, he looked so s-s-scared and frightened of me. I've never seen him like that since the revolution. It was like I relived that small moment again. I saw him in tears and I-I-I couldn't stand the sight. I tried to calm him down but it only made things worse. He passed out, and it was all because of _me. _Everything is probably just my fault."

America removed his glasses and began to wipe his tears with his sleeve, but his reddish eyes were visible to the other countries. Japan was the first one to come forward and speak to him.

"America-san, I'm sorry for arguing with you back there, and I know that I I don't know what you're going through. Although, you can't just say this was all your fault. It wasn't your fault that England got hit. It wasn't your fault that England doesn't remember anything about you. Most of this isn't your fault, and don't think that you are to blame." He forced himself a smile, but all that he could see were pouring tears escaping from America's blue eyes.

"No, if I haven't had left him alone, maybe he wouldn't be in that hospital bed. We wouldn't have to be in this situation. He wouldn't have lost every memory with me. He's here in this goddamn place all because of me. And I know that you can't disagree with me. You know it's the truth. Don't you dare and try to tell me that he's not here because of me."

Japan glared his eyes back to the other countries surrounding them. He gave them the slight look that showed how he _did _agree with what America had just said. It was true that America left England in the cold winter streets all alone while he went to go get something for him. It was true that England would get impatient and try to figure out what America was doing. It was true that if America didn't leave England, everything that was going on wouldn't be happening. In reality, this was _all _America's fault.

"Oh mon ami, it it true how you would think that, but you should have hope for England. It may seem your fault for all of this, but you should realize that he _may _remember you. He _may_ forgive you sooner or later. I can't promise these things to you, but you should have hope, oui?" France placed a hand on America's shoulder, feeling it tense and trembling from his sobs.

America hugged his knees and bent his head so that none of the countries would have to see his sobbing face. His glasses rested on the floor beside him, and wet spots from his tears started to appear on his pants. France kneeled down to his side and grabbed him for a small hug. America didn't try to protest the hug, he sat there in confusion and began to cry in his arms.

"I know how you feel for Angleterre, and I know how this breaks your heart so much right now. I know how he is more than just a brother to you America, and I know how all of that just seemed to go away all because of this accident. It looks like he's never going to forgive you now, but every story has a happy ending, non?" France whispered softly in his ear so the other countries wouldn't be able to hear. America's eyes widened and his tears started to slow down.

"Francis..." America quickly shut his mouth before the nations could hear. Whenever America wants to talk to any of the countries personally, he addresses by their human names. This only happens with with a few countries such as England, France, Canada, and sometimes Japan, and it's rare for them to speak with them in their human names. "Sorry, I didn't mean to blurt that out," America whispered with a gentle and faint voice.

"Don't worry Alfred, things will get better soon. Like Kiku said, even if Arthur doesn't get his memories back, you can create new ones to replace the old ones."

America couldn't bring a smile to his face.

_It wouldn't be the same England I grew up with. _

_It wouldn't be the same England I betrayed to._

_It wouldn't be the same England who I fought against._

_It wouldn't be the same Arthur that I met for the first time._

_It wouldn't be the same Arthur who I felt a connection to._

_Nothing would ever be the same without England. _

"Nothing would ever be the same without him, that's not the same England I met on that rye field." America didn't bother to whisper in France's ear, the other countries could hear him clearly now.

"Alfred, I know that but-" France was interrupted by loud footsteps closing near the nations.

"ITALY! I thought I told you to stay and keep-" Germany shouted creating an echo that surrounded the corridor, but stopped after he was grabbed on by Italy.

"I know! I know! But he woke up and he told me he wanted to know where was all of you and..." Italy was starting to lose his breath from speaking too fast after he ran sprints to find the other nations, getting lost along the way.

"Italy, calm down, and what happened? Did something happen to England?" Japan assured Italy into calming down but now America was on all ears.

_Did something bad happen to England? Is it my fault again?_

"Italy, what happened? Just tell us now!" America shouted as tears started to form in his eyes. Italy let out a small whimper but Germany patted his back for safety.

"He told me that he wanted to speak with France and Japan alone. He also said that it might take a while. And when he told me to do so, he sounded so different, it felt so scary!"

All of the nations were a little puzzled, but somewhat afraid of what America could say or do next. England didn't ask for him to come, and sadness and anger filled up inside him very quickly.

"Well, maybe you should go and talk to him. After all he asked for you two. You shouldn't keep him waiting." A cruel voice escaped his lips and now the countries were starting to get a bit frightened of America.

"Oui, let's just go see what he wants. Shall we go, Japan?" France tried to sound as least concerned as he can, but he could tell it wasn't working.

"Yes. Sayonara, America." He waved to America but he didn't even take a glance.

Both Japan and France nodded in agreement before they began walking to England's room.

_Both America and England are losing themselves._

* * *

**I actually feel terrible for all the shit I made America go through in this chapter. It happened in the first story I wrote, but at least he had England to help him through. Even though I somehow made America in pure sadness, I enjoyed writing this chapter. This makes me such a terrible person, no?**

**Next chapter will probably include England telling Japan and France about what happened, and maybe no America in it, but I was glad to write a chapter about what was happening for America instead what was going on for England. **

**Please favorite and/or review! (Or else I will beat you with a pipe!)**

**(No I wouldn't...kolkolkolkolkolkol...)**

**(Maybe)**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**


	7. Chapter 7

"What do you think England would like to talk to us about?" Deep concern washed onto Japan's face as they passed room through room until they reached their destination. Nervousness took over Japan and he slowly began to tremble as he walked.

"Well for obvious reasons, he'll talk about America. Other than that, I don't know. He was the one after all who told me to leave the room so he could speak to America privately, maybe he'll say something about what happened back there."

Japan nodded back as his response. Questions still rang in their heads as they turned from hallway to hallway. Who knows what England would talk to them about? It made it worse that he didn't ask for America to come speak with them, and it was even informed that it would take a long while before they could report back to the other countries about their little visit.

They took their last stop and slowed down as they approached England's door. They stared off into the plain,white door and took deep breaths before France would knock on the door.

_Oh Angleterre, I hope you're still in there. You lost America, now you lost yourself. _

France slowly opened the door and took a look st England.

Italy was right.

Something seemed off from him. It felt like his eyes were darker in color, and underneath them were starting to form bags. His hair was messier than usual and a glare was forced on France and Japan.

England looked so weak, but it like if they did anything wrong, he would kill them in an instant.

"England?" France took a quick breath after he could hear himself stuttering. For the first time in a while, he was greatly frightened of England. "We heard that you n-n-needed something, o-o-or wanted to t-talk to us. What do you want to tell us?"

England was shocked from the way France spoke and how he and Japan looked at him. Their eyes were widened out of fear and their bodies were shaking and could watch as they tried to stop themselves, but failed miserably.

_Why are they staring at me like that? Is there something on my face?_

England's blinked his eyes in realization. He hasn't looked in a mirror lately, and would never get out of his bed unless he needed to go to he restroom.

"I have to tell you something, but you have to promise me that you won't tell anyone, especially America. Understood?" his voice almost sounded like it normally was and watched as the two nations nodded and came closer to his side.

England sighed and his voice started to fill with doubt and wonder.

"I don't know how to explain this, but I'm almost starting to believe about what you've been saying of America." His eyes darted to the two nations as they let out a slight breath as relief was found in their faces.

"Don't get too excited. Something happened while I was passed out." England shuddered for a second and looked back at France.

"He asked me about the war. I didn't remember _anything. _I remember myself beating you after the war. Everything after that is blank. Right there I began to panic, my head was spinning so fast and it felt like I was going to stop breathing."

France stared back in shock as he grasped in everything England was saying.

"Then, I saw him."

"Saw who?" Japan said back with worry in his mouth.

"I was taking care of him. I saw myself taking care of a small child. I thought it was some kind of dream, but it wasn't. I don't remember doing that in my entire life, but it's like it belongs to me. I had a memory of America as a child. Nothing more."

France was stunned to the point where he couldn't move. The good thing about this was that he _does _remember America, but why did he only receive one single memory and how did he get it back?

"I was overwhelmed with shock. I felt myself drifting away and the lights started to go dim. Before I closed my eyes, I saw America again as a child. I heard him whisper my name before I passed out."

A wet tear fell down his cheek before he could start speaking again. He looked down at his hands on his lap, not wanting to see the expressions of France or Japan.

"I woke up in this strange place, everywhere you looked there was only white. It looked like there was no exit to be found, and I started to believe that I was dead. I looked everywhere to escape, and I was running out of options. That's when I saw _him._"

"Him? Do you mean America-san?" Japan went closer to England's side and patted his shoulder for comfort.

"No, I met _myself. _I know it seems strange and that it might look like a dream, but it wasn't. When we first met, he looked like someone who just woke up from the dead. He was me after the accident. He's my _memories._" he turned his head back to France to see a look of confusion.

"Your memories? Memories were never a person the last time I checked. Maybe that crash went a little too far in your head." Japan nudged France in the stomach for making that statement.

_Does Japan believe me? He doesn't look that surprised to me..._

"So, what did your _memories _say to you?" France said with mockery in his tone.

England sighed one last time before he explained everything. "He said that he was a part of me, but the accident did something to us. Something is blocking my past self from reminding me of my memories. That's why I've been forgetting everything about America. But just for a small moment, he was released. I was able to remember America as a child and me as his caretaker. After I remembered, my memories were blocked again." England refrained from speaking any longer.

_If I told them that _I'm _the one who blocking America, they would all think it was my fault that all of this was happening. God, if America was listening right now..._

Silence filled the room and no one wanted to break it. Japan tried to think of all the explanations of why this was happening while France stood there stunned of what he had just heard.

"England, it seems like you're telling the truth, but I can't put this all together. I feel like you're forgetting to tell us something." Japan spoke out in the too-quiet room.

_Damn, I think he's noticing what's going on._

"If this person is your past, wouldn't he also hold the memories of all the other countries? It would mean you wouldn't be able to recognize anybody when you woke up. And how was he able to give a memory to you until he was blocked again? I don't understand how he was able to accomplish that." Japan narrowed his eyes back at England, waiting patiently for an answer.

_You're going to have to tell them sooner or later Arthur, this includes America._

England froze at what he heard inside his head. His other self was speaking to him.

_But how? They would either think I'm saying nonsense or argue with me that I am practically betraying America. _

_True, but after all of that, they'll help you into releasing me and you remembering America once more._

_How can you be so sure about that? _

_I am you of course. I have my doubts and so do you. You have to tell them._

"Arthur?! Are you even listening to us?"

_Arthur? Why is France calling me by my human name?_

Then, something clicked in England's brain.

_Alfred. _

_Alfred F. Jones. That's his real name. _

"Angleterre! What is on with you? Are you deaf or something?" France began shaking England to startle him out of his trance.

_How- You were released again? _

_I used to be, now I'm stuck again. But that is his human name._

England looked into France's blue eyes with wide eyes.

"His name. It's Alfred. His name is Alfred F. Jones. Am I correct?"

France took his hand away from England's shoulders and backed away slowly before he bumped into a wall. Japan turned and nodded his head as a response.

"How did you figure it out? Your past self is released?" Japan stood a bit closer to England than usual. He was curious into why this was all happening in a single moment.

"He was, but now he's blocked again. He's blocked because of me." He placed a hand to his temple in confusion but in wonder to why this occurred.

"What do you mean-" Japan started but England interrupted him.

"I didn't want to tell you this, but the 'something' that is blocking my memories is _me_. I don't know why I am but because of me, I can't remember anything of America. My past self told me that I'm allowing my memories of the other nations into my mind, but not America. To put this all together, I forgot America by my own will and it's all my fault." England waited for the tears to fall down his face and for the shouting to begin.

All he felt was a warm hug coming from Japan.

"You remembered him twice, but you can do it again. It's not entirely your fault, and this is how America is feeling right now. He thinks that he should be to blame for all of this happening." Japan spoke with a sincere and soft voice that calmed England down.

"He thinks that this is all his fault? Why the bloody hell would he think that?" he could see that his tears were falling into the Japanese man's clothes.

"He cares for you Arthur-san," England flinched at the sound of his human name. "he's almost at the point where he could break down in complete misery."

"Let me see him. When I leave this hospital, I want to see him. I _need _to see him. I just have to." Tears continued to fall down and his eyes were puffy and red from his sobbing.

"You really need to see him, don't you?" France stood by the bed with a slow and soft voice that comforted England.

"I just want to remember him."

He held into Japan's arms and continued to sob until he was all out of tears.

* * *

**I am now finished with the most depressing and saddest section of the story. Hopefully. **

**England is FINALLY going to leave the hospital and see America again in the next chapter *squeals in joy* and I could sense some yaoi in the later chapters.  
Sometimes I could just be France when it comes to yaoi or anything having to do with USUK. Oh, did anyone catch a small bit of AsaKiku in there? I didn't know what else to put so... yeah.**

**Next week is gonna be Thanksgiving and I might post a oneshot on that day.  
I have a few ideas for stories and it would help me if you could pick out which stories would be good for me to write:**

**-Beauty & the Beast (using Germany as the beast and Italy as Belle)  
-Seven Deadly Sins (Vocaloid version using Hetalia characters)  
-Hetaoni(I want it to be something with HRE and Italy in it, but who knows...)  
-Alluring Secret(still with the Vocaloid song with nations)  
-Fluff(just pure fluff)  
-Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Years special(all the nations coming together and ****celebrating the holidays together...)  
-(I have an idea about Prussia no longer was declared a nation and he becomes a human. He goes on the rest of his life growing old and basically how the other countries are reacting to this *looks at Germany and Hungary*)**

**Those are all the ideas I have to write, so please tell me which one do you guys think I should write, any would be fine!  
**

**Please review and favorite since you guys are the best!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**


	8. Chapter 8

_Great, don't tell me I forgot how to walk as well._

England stumbled across the corridor and held on to the walls for support of his weak legs. He hasn't walked in a few weeks, causing him to not be able to walk properly without the use of a wall.

Finally, England was allowed to leave the hospital and see America once again. He hurried to get outside but his legs refused to cooperate with him.

"Mr. Kirkland? Don't you need a wheelchair for the time being? Do you need any help?" a nurse came beside him and almost pushed her away so he could get to an exit.

"No, I don't need anything, I'll just be going," he spoke in a rushed tone before he turned around the corner into another hallway. Everywhere he went it seemed like there were more twists and turns to go through and several doctors or nurses stopping him when he was holding on to the walls for support. It was like a maze he couldn't get through, his legs making it more difficult than it already was.

_Just need to find a map, any directory to find the entrance. _

He walked very slow, only making matters worse as he went around another corner and fell straight to the floor. He pulled himself up using his arms and the wall and began to stumble across the hallway.

Turn. Turn. Twist. Turn back around. Turn. Fall. Turn. Fall again. Turn. Twist. Turn. Every move England seemed to get him further from the exit. He continued to walk down a narrow hallway and felt the walls disappear from his reach. He had to rely on his balance for him to move.

_Where. Is. The. Fucking. Entrance. My bloody legs are going to give out any second, and if they do, they'll put me in another room again!_

He could barely keep himself up and expected to fall onto the cold hard floor. Instead he felt his shoulders being grabbed on by a warm set of hands.

"Don't worry! I got him!" he felt his arm getting dragged around the person's neck and his head pulled to his chest as they moved forward. England pushed away thinking it was probably a nurse taking him back to where he started, but found himself being directed towards light.

"God, my legs are killing me." he muttered those words as he held on to the man beside him.

"Well I am here to help you Iggy, I'm the hero after all!"

_Wait. Is this..._

"America?" he looked up to see a young man with wheat blonde hair and a cowlick sticking out. His sea blue eyes were hidden behind a pair of glasses that rested upon his nose. His mouth was stuck in a grin as he laughed in an obnoxious manner.

"_America!_" England pushed forward and crashed on top of America as they fell on top of the rough,concrete floor. His arms grasped in his embrace and his head rested on his neck.

_"England! You're back home!" _

_"Of course I am, silly America!" _He found himself opening a door to see America as a child again, but he looked somehow different. He looked a bit taller than the last memory, like he aged a couple years in between them.

_"I'm so happy you're back England! I missed you!" _

_He missed me? Were we really that close together? Are we still like this? _

_"I missed you too, America." _A soft smile appeared on his face and he hugged the young America with slight laughter.

_I looked so...happy with him. _

"England, are you alright? You seem a bit touchy today," he blinked his eyes once he heard America's voice again. He watched as his grin turned into a smirk and quickly moved away from his embrace.

"I am _not_ touchy today! Nor was I ever, you bloody wanker!" his cheeks blushed a few shades of red, annoyed by the fact that America was still laughing.

"Man,you haven't really changed that much! Well, except for..." America paused nervously before he could answer.

_You have to tell him sooner or later, the other countries shouldn't tell him._

_How can I? You know how he would react._

_Yes, I do. But you should tell him before 'certain' memories come back to you._

_What do you mean by 'certain' memories?_

There was no reply. _  
_

"Never mind that America. I was just... glad to see you," His looked down at the ground so he wouldn't have to see America's face.

"You were?" The surprisement in his voice made England look back up at him. He didn't expect England to miss him after the conversation they had a few days back. They looked into each other's eyes for a while before they spoke again.

"I was, but I-" he was muffled from America's shoulder covering his mouth as he tried to speak. His head rested on his shoulder and America's arms were holding on to England.

"Me too! You don't know how much I missed you England!" he sounded so cheerful and energetic, but something about it made him smile back.

"Great, but can you please help me up, I can't really move my bloody legs now," he held on to America's arm as he struggled to stand up. He pulled him up very slowly so that England was able to catch his balance, but didn't work. He caught him in time before he fell again and guided his arms around America's neck.

"You really _can't _control your legs that much right?" America questioned as England held on to him taking small steps at a time.

"I haven't gotten out of that bed that much for a few weeks! What else do you expect?!" shouted England, still clinging on America for support. He let out a small chuckle and kept on walking. All the walking and the weakness in his legs made him tired, and now he was relying on America to guide him because of it.

"I was going to say, why did Japan and France say that you wanted to see me? And what were you guys talking about in there?" America questioned as they continued to walk.

England didn't reply at first, but let out a small sigh before he could speak. " I wanted to see you, that's all. And what we said in there, I'll tell you about that later, not right now."

_Just let him believe me and to not ask anymore questions about this._

America let out a slight frown and asked once more. "What you were talking about was concerning me, right?"

England blinked and looked back at America for his reply. "Yes and no. We did, but what I talked about with Japan and France had to do more with me than with you." America held his mouth open in wonder and didn't bother to ask another question about what happened.

"Alright, but you look really tired, you should get to bed." he nudged England awake so he wouldn't fall asleep on America's shoulder.

England muttered something but it was enough for America to hear.

"I want to go home with you."

America was somewhat startled when he had said those words, but kept a smile on his face whatsoever.

"I'll do that Iggy, just don't fall asleep on me." he spoke in a soothing tone that made England sleepier than he already was.

England couldn't help but to put on a smile.

* * *

**And they finally meet again! Well, for the third time really, but who gives a fuck they're together! And when his past self was talking about 'certain' memories, I think you know which ones I'm talking about... **

**It's almost Thanksgiving... what to do on that day...**

**This chapter didn't really turn out the way I planned , but as long as it's finished, I'm fine... I hope. **

**Anywho, please favorite and/or review if you would like!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me unfortunately. **


	9. Chapter 9

"You let America go _alone _to get England? What kind of idea is that, aru?" Numerous rants came straight from China's mouth alone, not accepting the fact that the American should take the person who himself had made pass out to be removed from the hospital.

Japan continued to reassure to his elder brother that this had to happen. "England requested for America-san to be the first person he sees when he leaves, and we allowed America to go alone this time."

China still didn't agree with what he was saying. "Even if he did ask, you think that letting that stupid America go alone was a good idea? We can't trust that American with England after what happened, aru!"

"I have to agree with him on this, we can't trust America with taking England alone. You all know how he is, and we shouldn't have let go alone without our approval." Germany stepped into the argument in a stern and clear voice, watching as China narrowed his eyes back to Japan and France.

"We all know that we would never put Amerique in these kind of situations, but don't you think that we should trust him after what happened? You saw how upset he was, he would be serious about England at this point, oui?" France pointed out before anyone can argue any further. "America isn't going to act how he usually is to Angleterre right now, he's going to be serious and worried about him. What else can you expect?"

A few nations nodded in agreement, but others didn't approve of his statement. "You can expect England to pass out again because of that stupid America, aru. You never know what can happen once they meet." replied China in a calmer tone than before.

France let out a slight nod in agreement to China. He was correct, who knew what could happen when they meet once again? The previous times have been a disaster so far, so why not this time?

"I guess that we can agree on you with that, but America would know better than to harm England. He does show a hint of responsibility now because of everything going on." said Japan in a soothing tone. He took a quick glance at France, unsure whether or not to tell the other nations about their conversation with England.

"Da, but we never rely on America then, we shouldn't rely on him now." said Russia bluntly while the rest of the nations nodded nervously so it wouldn't look like they were disagreeing with him.

Italy spoke in a response. "Can't we try to rely on him? He doesn't deserve this so-" he didn't get to finish after Germany clamped his hand over his mouth to refrain him from anymore talking. A dark aura appeared around Russia and a childish yet cruel and disturbing smile appeared on his face. Fortunately before he could do any damage, China tried to calm him down, and it surprisingly worked.

"No, it's _England _who doesn't deserve this." The countries turned their heads to face towards Japan with him looking at the ground. France nudged him for a small moment with the countries watching them discuss under their breaths. A few nations were able to make out some sentences that were muttered from Japan and France.

"Do you think England would be fine with telling them the truth?"

"I'm not sure, but it is a risk," Italy and Germany looked in confusion while Russia and China moved a bit closer to hear what they were saying.

"And what if Angleterre gets furious?"

"He said that we couldn't say a word of this to America-san, so as long as they don't say anything about it to him, England would be fine." Japan spoke in a sharp voice that the other countries were able to hear clearly.

"Still, how do you know they will react in a positive way?" the concern in France's voice made the countries move closer to the duo.

"You are right, but you realize that England is going to tell America alone about it, and his reaction won't be pretty."

No one said a word for a small time. France stood there in disbelief at what Japan just told him.

"What do you-"

"We have it the easy way, we're telling them about it all and we know it might not end well. That's why England called us to be told about what was going on with him. He knew that we wouldn't be upset or angry at him, that's why we were the first ones he wanted to talk to. And you know that if America was in that room with us..."

Japan stopped for a moment to think about what would've happened. He shook his head and turned back at France.

"I don't know how he would react. All I know is that it wouldn't be pleasant."

France sighed in agreement and turned to the other countries. China was the first to interrupt the silence. "What did you two talk about with England, aru?" he waited for a response from his younger brother but neither would say a word.

"Something..._strange _has happened to England, it's going to be a while to explain everything," France walked over to China and looked over at Japan to see if he'll help explain as well.

"Of course it's _strange_, da? He lost all memory of America, what else is there to talk about?" Russia said in a careless tone before France could speak again.

"I know about that part, but do you all don't know what's making him forget Amerique," replied France, surprising other nations of what he had said.

Germany stepped forward in confusion. "What do you mean by something that's causing England to forget him?"

Everyone stared back at France and Japan, waiting relentlessly for an answer. After what the other countries had just heard, they seemed suspicious of what the duo can say to them. Was their response that terrible? Will the truth about England affect them all?

"Are you saying that this is all a joke, aru? Some prank pulled off by that Brit to frighten America? If it is, I'll kick his ass for getting us involved, but congratulate him on doing that to America, aru." China explained with a sigh, hoping it was the real truth of what is going on now.

"No, he did forget, but he's forgetting him by his own will." Japan corrected China's statement, only to see him blink in confusion.

China opened his mouth to speak. "You mean to tell me that he's forgetting a nation _on purpose?_"

Few nations held their mouths open in shock, while France and Japan shook their heads rapidly in disagreement. "No,no,no,no,no...well, yes, but he doesn't mean to. England never meant to forget America-san in the first place!"

"If he doesn't mean to forget America, then why doesn't he remember him now?" Italy spoke in the mist of words, saying a question that each person had on their minds.

Japan was the one to answer his question. "He doesn't remember because his memories are blocked. Something is keeping him for remembering America and this 'thing' is him himself. There is a person inside him, and he is all of England's memories. He was blocked by England after the accident and now his past self can't transmit any memories to him."

France took over for a while. "The reason why Angleterre isn't forgetting the rest of us is because he's _choosing _to forget only Amerique and no one else. He never meant to do that, but it's why everything is going on right now."

At that point, it looked like Russia wanted to punch someone and Germany was on the verge of frustration. Italy sat in confusion and China pulled a hand to his temples, thinking about what his brother had just told them.

"Don't worry,da, I'll make England's memories unblocked using my lead pipe," Russia said menacingly with a smile across his face.

"That is _not _a good idea, Russia, aru!" China concealed Russia from talking so he wouldn't speak any further.

"You know what, he's _right, _if England forgot America on his own, then why were we even put into this mess with him?" Japan stood there blankly as he watched Germany take Russia's side.

"Germany, what if this were to happen to _Italy? _If he forgot you, what would you do? I'll tell you where you would be, you'll be sulking or would be blaming yourself for what is going on. You would be pleading or asking for help but who knows if someone is going to help you or not. You know that nobody wants to be in America's position right now, nor in England's, so that's why we have to get them through this, do you understand?" France's words seemed to shock everyone in the room.

He continued to stare blankly at France and turned to Italy. Germany could see that he wouldn't want Italy to be in the situation that England and America were in now, and realized what everything Japan and France had previously been talking about was true.

They knew this meeting wasn't going to end well, and they were right on with that.

Japan stepped towards France and let out a slight whisper. "Maybe you took it too far with Germany,"

France let out a breath and turned at Germany again. "I guess I did, didn't I?" he put on a weak smile and began to speak again. "Germany, I didn't mean to say that to-"

"Ja, ja, I know you're trying to apologize. I'm sure you meant no harm but," he took a glare back at Italy who was minding his own business. "you're right, none of us would want to be in the situation they're in now. I guess that's why we should help them through this, but how?"

Japan and France stood dumbfounded at his very statement. He was right, what can the other countries do to help England remember America once more?

"We still haven't told you everything, there's a tiny detail we forgot to mention and it's when Angleterre passed out that day. It may be an advantage for us so that he can remember Amerique once more." said France in a more casual tone than before.

A few countries had doubts in their minds about all of this but still continued to go along.

China raised his hand. "What kind of advantage are you talking about, aru?"

They both returned him a kind smile.

"An advantage, or more of a solution to the problem we are currently in," Japan stepped forward to reassure the other countries.

"Alright then, inform us about it." Germany took his eyes off from watching over Italy and towards Japan.

Japan and France nodded their heads and joined the other nations to tell them how they can solve this problem with England.

* * *

**I think I wrote a crappy ending to this chapter, but who knows...****And out of all the days, it's finally Thanksgiving, and such a wonderful day to post another chapter of this story.  
I enjoyed yet I HATED to write this chapter, I kept on running out of ideas to put in but I'm at least satisfied with how it turned out, I hope.  
****I'm surprised that I'm still typing because I stayed up almost all night reading Disney/Hetalia parodies and fangirling hard enough to (almost) wake up my parents...is that a good thing?  
Anywho, please favorite/review if you enjoy the story!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me, if it did, you would see lots of yaoi in the episodes...**


	10. Chapter 10

England groaned as he opened his eyes to find himself sitting up from an old and worn out couch in the middle of his living room. He began to rub his eyes softly as the weariness slowly vanished away.

_I must've fell asleep when I was with America, and where the bloody hell is he now? _

He pushed himself off from the couch and walked around to see if America was near. Every single room in his house was in utter silence, and it seemed to England that America must have left after he was taken care of.

England sighed deeply in defeat, knowing he won't see him in a while now. He began to walk upstairs very slowly so he wouldn't fall over and get injured again, but stopped immediately once he heard a noise.

It was coming from upstairs, it sounded so faint but he continued to walk up each step carefully so the voice wouldn't hear. England got closer to where the voice was coming from, and it became obvious that the person was communicating on a phone.

"Yeah, he's fine, he's sleeping right now," He knew that voice, it was America's.

_So he didn't leave? _

_'No, of course he didn't. He cares a lot more than you think.'_

_You're back? Came for another memory? _

_'I don't know what causes me to be released, so don't expect that much from me,'_

_You can be a bloody pain in the ass you know that right?_

_'I am you after all. Now would you just listen to what is going on?' _

_Sure, but for your information, I am _not _a pain in the ass. _

No reply.

He focused himself on the conversation going on with America on the phone, waiting for anything to be heard.

"Geez, why do you sound so worried? He's _fine. _Iggy's not dying anytime soon." the amount of certainty flowed in his voice, reassuring himself that England was okay.

A few mumbles were shouted through on the phone enough to know that it was China who was ranting.

"You can't see him now, he's too tired. England looked like he was going to collapse any second when he was exiting the hospital! Does that prove much to you?" At that point, it sounded as if America can yell at the top of his lungs.

Another moment of silence passed, nothing could be heard except for the few quiet breaths England was making.

"At the exact moment he realized I was there, he was overjoyed, we both fell to the ground because he was hugging me," Calmness returned to the American's voice and England blinked while blushing a few shades of red.

_He actually said what I did once I saw him? What is with this guy?_

"No, he didn't seem strange, but he looked tired as hell. England asked me to bring him to his house, so I did. He fell asleep on the way so I figured he was just exhausted or something." said America in a reassuring voice.

England couldn't hear any more ranting or other noises from the phone anymore. It was either America had hung up or the person he is currently talking with is quiet enough to not be heard.

He went down the stairway slowly so that when America wouldn't catch England eavesdropping on his phone conversation.

"Wait, you're letting me-"

The Brit stopped crawling down the stairs and heard America shout in surprisement. Silence returned and began to cry out more.

"You're serious? You sure about all of this?" America was full of astonishment by this point and a cheerful tone came to him. England started to step down the stairs a bit quicker after realizing America's conversation will be over soon.

"Alright! The hero will not let you down! See ya later!" England could hear the American jump up and down from excitement on the upper floor as he used the wall to guide him through the room for support.

_Okay, now he seems too excited. What were they even talking about? _

The rapid movement of footsteps broke through his thoughts as America was approaching the first floor. They stopped as soon as America caught sight of England walking with him leaning next to the wall.

"England, are you alright? You look startled," A shudder ran through the Brit as he heard the familiar voice behind him. England turned his head to find America standing still, watching England move slowly but better than he was when he left the hospital.

_'He asked you a question, now answer it you bloody git!'_

England's body shuddered for a few seconds. He couldn't stop the trembling throughout his entire body and America was beginning to notice.

"I'm just cold, but I'm fine," he lied. A deep breath of relief was heard from the towering nation. America walked closer to England and stood by his side.

"Do you need a blanket or something? You're shivering like crazy man," England didn't get to answer. America was already walking over to the couch to find any blankets or anything that could be used to warm up England.

America suddenly lit up with an idea in his head, and England could tell that he was thinking of something ridiculous. He watched as America slowly removed his bomber jacket from his body and handed it over to England.

"There is a coat over there at the side of the door, I could take that instead," England tried to use any excuse not to take this nation's jacket, but America kept on insisting that he should.

"You've worn it before, and besides you said that you were cold."

_"Come on, Iggy, you know that you want to wear it!" _

England blinked as he heard America's voice inside his head.

_"For the last time, I will not wear your bloody jacket!"_

_"And why not?" _

_"Because...well... why are you asking me to anyways?" _

_"I just want to know how it's like on you and not on me!" _

England watched as he narrowed his eyes at the America who was giving him the jacket. He took in a breath and grabbed it forcefully out of America's hand.

_"Fine, but just for a while." _

_"Alright, Iggy,"_

Even though England was watching a mere memory, he could feel the warmth and softness of his jacket and felt so relaxed the second he slid it on his own shoulders.

England didn't expect all of these rushing feelings inside of him once he put that article of clothing on, it was just that comfortable.

_"It's feels comfy, and it's really warm..." _

_"See? What did the Hero tell ya?" _

_"Oh, shut up you bloody git," _

He snapped back to reality as England reached his hand out for the jacket America was still holding in his hands. Shaking, America came over and placed his jacket over England's body.

The sudden touch of the jacket on himself made England stop from all the trembling and calmed him down for some reason.

_What is it about his jacket that makes me so serene at it's touch?_

"Um...thanks I guess..." muttered England as he bowed his head away from America.

"No problem, Iggy! Just doing what I can to help!" America happily shouted as he patted England's shoulder for reassurement.

England had a slight blush on his cheeks and continued to snuggle inside of the jacket. It was so warm from the use of America wearing it that England couldn't help but deepen himself into the jacket.

_God, it's so warm..._

He looked over at America to see that he was staring back at England for getting comfortable in his own jacket.

"Sorry, it's just that it's really soft and warm and..." his words trailed off as America let out a grin.

"That's almost the same thing you told me the first time you wore it, you looked just as surprised as before!" America's laughter filled the house and England continued to blush deep shades of red.

"Shut up you git," whispered England as America continued to laugh throughout his home. It was quite annoying that America was laughing this much in an obnoxious manner, but it was somewhat pleasant in a way.

_There's just something about America that makes my heart race and my body shake all of a sudden, but why is this? _

But England didn't seem to mind.

_I just need more time with America, that's all..._

* * *

**Two words: Crappy chapter. I know that it was a bit rushed, but what else is there to write?**

**I was listening to Magnet and Butterfly on Your Right Shoulder while writing this, and I don't know whether that was a good or bad idea...**

**Happy December to you all, but tomorrow is Monday and today is the last day of Thanksgiving break for me, so I have to spend this time wisely before I go back to that wretched place they call a school.**

**Please favorite/review if you enjoyed!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me!**


	11. Chapter 11

"So did you hear me on the phone upstairs?" America asked with his elbows leaning on his knees as he sat next to England on the same couch he was sleeping on earlier.

England took a slow sip of his tea and turned to face the American. "Not really, I just heard a few mumbles upstairs after I woke up. I couldn't make out anything you were saying, so I just ignored it."

He lied, but America didn't seem to notice and went along with what the Brit had said.

_What made him so energetic while he was on the phone? What kind of news would make him so enthusiastic at this time?_

England sighed and went to take a quick sip of his tea to feel a bit more relaxed. He watched America breath in and out as he laid his head around the corner of the couch, thinking of what else to speak to England.

There was a duration of silence between them, yet England waited for a question to be asked or anything to be answered. He continued to cuddle himself up in the jacket that England was still wearing after it was given by America.

America darted his sapphire eyes over to England's emerald ones nudged the Brit to get his attention. "How do you feel? I mean, about the accident, you know." he spoke in a low whisper but it was loud enough for England to hear.

The Englishman set his cup of tea on the table in front of him and crossed his arms by his chest. "I've almost healed completely, only the numbness in my legs and the dizziness are bothering right now. I'm perfectly fine besides that,"

_I'm lying again aren't I? I'm not fine, I'm forgetting a nation that is known to be a large part in my life, and he doesn't even know that I'm forgetting him on purpose against my will. The worst part about this is how I'm going to be able to tell him, and what he may think of me after then..._

He shuddered at the very thought, but quickly removed it away from his head as he hugged himself into America's jacket and felt the pleasant warmth again.

America let a smile form on his lips once he heard that England felt okay. He couldn't help but feel happy that England was okay and sitting next to him after all the events at the hospital.

"What about you? The other nations? Do you know what you all did while I was in there?" he looked over to America, who jumped after his question was asked.

Unsure, America opened his mouth to speak. "I guess most of the countries were discussing stuff about you and thinking of any solution to fix it. I wasn't that much of a help to them, so I just left myself alone for a while,"

It was simple for England to notice the slight change of voice America was talking through. He could hear his voice soften and lower as America got closer to the end. It was like his voice was filled with sadness and despair as he continued to talk.

"I didn't know what to say or do when you were at the hospital. It was pretty much useless to talk to the other nations, so I stayed quiet for a long time before anything happened," America nodded let himself know that he was finished speaking.

"It does make sense, since France and Japan told me that you seemed very _worried _about me. Is that true?" England turned on his side to face America directly towards him.

America's breath shuddered beneath him. "Yeah, it was true. I did get worried about you. It didn't feel right to see you on that hospital bed."

England stared down at his knees and felt the the leather that surrounded the jacket. It's smooth surface touching the edges of his skin, giving a small amount of pleasure.

"Well, lucky for you I'm out of that bloody hospital. It feels good that I can finally relax and clear up some things in my mind." said England as he put on a slight smile.

He could hear a chuckle from his side and found himself watching America smiling back.

_Why would I forget him? _

England's thought process was interrupted by loud pounds coming from the front door. The person outside shouted through the knocks easily and could be heard from the inside.

"America! Open this damn door, aru! If you don't open it, _I will kick this door open! _OPEN UP!"

"Guess China still doesn't trust me with you." America shrugged and pushed himself up from the couch. "I'll get-"

A small gasp escaped America's lips as the door burst open and the doorknob was now broken beyond repair. He could see the Chinese man still raising his leg in rage and Russia placing his pipe on China's shoulder happily.

China stormed into England's house grabbed America by his collar and was now at eye level with him. "Dude, China, just calm down! I thought we already discussed this!" shouted America as he raised his hands up in reassurement.

"Doesn't matter in any situation, I do not trust you with anything having to do with England, now where is he?" China quickly let go of America once he pointed to the living room where England was sitting quietly on the couch.

The Chinese man sighed in relief and placed a hand on his chest. "Great, he hasn't done anything with you, aru. Luckily America didn't-" China stopped immediately once he found England in America's jacket, curling himself up in it as he turned to where all the noise was coming from.

America watched as China turned his head back and forth from himself to England repeatedly in disbelief at what he was seeing. Russia,Japan, and France entered his house but didn't seem too surprised at what England was wearing (France wasn't surprised at all, he would expect this from England and America).

"China, are you okay, man?"

"Does this look okay to you? Why would he be wearing that in the first place, aru?" Every nation besides Russia covered their ears from the practical screaming China was making. Russia was just enjoying everything in delight.

"He was cold, so I gave my jacket to him,"

"There is a _coat _right there by the door, aru! England would've been able to get it on his own!" he pointed furiously to the side of the door, where a coat was hung in place and highly noticeable to all the nations.

England stood up to speak. "I did notice the coat, but I,um..."he rubbed his head around and nodded to Japan. It took a while for Japan to realize that another memory had resurfaced and whispered quietly to France to inform him. "...I thought that I would feel better using his jacket rather than that old coat over there."

China widened his eyes and quickly lowered them so America wouldn't get suspicious of what was going on. He turned to face America and walked straight at him.

"Still don't trust you...but be careful with him, aru." America grinned at the sound of that and didn't suspect anything about England or the other nations.

Before China left the room to speak with Japan, he gave a stern look to England for a few seconds,darted his eyes to a joyful looking America, and turned away.

He knew what it meant, and England knew what China was saying through that expression.

_America may be happy now, but what's going to happen once you tell him? _

England shuddered again at the thought, he knew that Japan and France would tell the others about their situation, it wasn't that much of a surprise.

He consumed the warmth from the jacket once more for comfort and bowed his head in sorrow.

_I don't want that smiling,bright nation to leave me. I don't want America to leave me._

* * *

**All I could say... is that China broke England's door...**

**I'm back to school and there's been testing going on this week and it's killing me! The worst part of today was that I was taking a reading test and I fell dead asleep right after it. Sure it seems normal but once you wake up you find a puddle of goddamn drool on the test itself. **

**Another embarrassing story to add on in my life...**

**So I have to ask a question to you guys and can you please,please,please tell me what I should do? **

**I'm planning of writing a Hetalia parody of Beauty and the Beast and I just have two questions:**

**1. Rochu (Russia and China) or Gerita (Germany and Italy)? I'm more interested in a parody with Rochu but I'm fine with Gerita as well!**

**2. Based on the Disney adaption or with a somewhat original plot? I have ideas to give some originality to the plot, but who knows? **

**Please review/favorite of you enjoyed the story!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me. **


	12. Chapter 12

America focused carefully on the discussion the four nations were having together. Even when he tried to get closer, Japan would notice and China would follow after, giving a sickly glare towards the American.

He knew that England and the others were hiding something, but America didn't want to bring it up, especially when most of the countries were present. He watched as France,Japan, and China were whispering quiet notions to each other with Russia listening closely behind.

England was sitting silently and still on the couch taking small sips of his tea, ignoring the conversation going on. He knew that they were talking about him, as if the rants of China weren't already proving enough.

The American took out a sigh of frustration, and annoyed by the fact he wasn't allowed to know what was going on between England and the other countries. He felt like he had the right to know since England was the only person he was worrying about now. Even France and Japan knew this about America, but all they could do was wait for England to say something.

Luckily, the only thing good that was coming out of this for America was that he had more time to spend with England now. It at least gave him some spark of hope that he could see England again.

In the corner of his eye, he could see China nudge Japan on his arm and rolled his head slightly towards America. Japan responded with a shrug and a nod. America continued to watch closely as Japan came by him.

"We're leaving now, China only wanted to make sure that England was okay,"said Japan in a soft monotone voice.

_He wanted to make sure he was safe alright, safe from me._

The countries waved their goodbyes and headed out the front door... or at least the remains of what China had broke through.

Before China stepped outside, he pointed furiously back at America.

"And there is going to be a meeting in a few days, aru! Make sure that _you two _are not late!" he stormed off outside with Russia following after with a sinister smile.

America looked back at England, who was walking closer to him with the jacket still wrapped around his body. By now, he totally realized how _huge _that thing looked on the Brit. It seemed like it was several sizes larger on him and hung on his shoulders as it reached to his hips.

To be honest, England almost looked adorable to America now with the jacket on, it made him resemble more of a child now.

"And may I ask, why are you_ blushing?_" America's head jerked up at the sound of _'blushing'_. He raised both of his hands to his cheeks and could feel the warmth and redness swelling underneath.

_Fuck, how am I going to explain this to Iggy?_

America, still holding his hands to conceal his reddish cheeks, let out a nervous chuckle. "This...um...happens often with me..." England raised a eyebrow in suspicion. He could easily tell that America was lying as the blushing continued to spread.

"_Sure_," said England sarcastically,"It's pretty much simple to tell when you're lying by the looks of it." He watched as America turned himself around so his front side wasn't visible to England anymore.

The American hugged himself and could hear soft laughter escaping England's mouth. He sounded so delicate and sweet, it only made America's blushing worsen.

Then suddenly, it all stopped.

All he could hear were small shudders that surrounded his entire body. England's eyes widened and stare directly at the floor beneath them.

England was in the same state where America had found him earlier. His body was shaking like crazy, although not as bad. England griped his head, but not in pain, almost in confusion.

"Iggy?! Are you alright? You're shaking again!" he place a strong hand on England's wobbly shoulder to calm his nerves now. His blushing mess had gone back to his normal shad of flesh, but was now worried for England's sake.

* * *

_You just have to come at random times don't you?!_

_'Look, when I'm unblocked, I'm unblocked. There is nothing both of us can do to stop a memory. Sorry about that.'_

England focused his vision on a meeting. It was a meeting with the Allies, and all of them were clouding up the chalkboard.

_I drew those on the bottom, but why is...? _

_"What's up with these weird drawings?" _China could be heard in the memory, along with the rest of the Allies.

_"Who drew this crap, it does not capture the essence of my natural beauty!" _complained France as he shook his head in disbelief.

_"Yes, and I have a uni brow for some reason,"_

_"I think the ones at the bottom are better, aru," _

_"If that one is supposed to be of me, I'll hack it off with my pickax," _Russia gave off a creepy smile.

_"YOU WHAT?" _the three nations replied in unison.

On the further side of the room, he found America popping out in nervousness.

_"Well, that's just annoying! Why would someone choose to draw us in such a fashion?" _

It was already obvious that it was America who drew those crappy portraits of the Allies. Still, America continued with his useless nonsense about the drawings.

_"So it was you," _England placed his hand on America's restless shoulder.

_"You an ass!" _shouted China as he insulted America's attempt at drawing their faces.

The memory was slowly fading away with England regaining his trance from the sudden disturbance.

He blinked his eyes once he heard America's voice calling for him.

* * *

"Iggy! Are you okay?" America began to calm down as England started to snap out of that state. He remained silent as he looked up from the ground to see the concerned face of the American. England couldn't have the ability to speak, so all he gave was a simple nod.

"England! It's been the second time already, are you _sure _you're okay?"

"Y-y-yeah, I was just dazed off for a while, that's all," muttered England as he rubbed his fingers against his temples. His knuckles became white as England tightened his grip on the side of the jacket.

_This all seems strange, what is wrong with Iggy?_

America acted off like he believed what england was assuring him, he knew that Iggy was not telling the truth. He knew that he was trying to hide something, but America didn't bother to bring it up.

"Alright... if you say so," said America as he crossed his arms to his chest.

Neither said anything for a while. The air felt tense around them, and still growing as America's curiosity started to kick in.

_It's even happened in the hospital, so why is it still happening now. _

He turned around to see England standing by a glass window, still cuddling in the jacket, and the shaking had decreased to small breaths. At least he was 'fine'.

_England, just what are you hiding? _

* * *

**I haven't updated in a while... and this chapter is a bit shorter than I would like...**

**Now America is getting more suspicious about England!**

**And if you've watched the series(which we ****probably all have) I think you might know what the memory was about...**

**I've been busy with homework and studying for tests for about a week, so I wasn't able to write anything that much.**

**And I finally decided that I will be writing a Rochu parody of Beauty and the Beast! I'll post it during this story sometime either this or next week.**

**Please favorite/review if you enjoyed!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me!**


	13. Chapter 13

England knew that America was suspicious. Was he always like this before the accident? It wouldn't seem that the American would act this way, but could this be a different side to him that he never knew before the accident?

_'You know, if you just tell him-'_

_I know. I know. I KNOW. But when is the right time? _

_'Now,' _England flinched at those words, but luckily, America didn't notice.

_I can't, you know that I can't. I feel like I need more time before I could tell him._

_'Bloody hell, remember what I said once you were with America again? That you should tell him before 'certain' memories appear? You should take that for granted, I'm trying to help you a lot right here. Now tell him the truth!' _

_'Certain' memories? By which ones do you mean? _

England shook in fear once he heard the next words.

_'The ones you don't want to remember. The ones that haunt you for the rest of your life. The ones where you mistake them for a nightmare.'_

He tried to shake that thought out of his head, but it seemed like any motion he made would cause America to detect him. Yet those words kept on repeating themselves over and over that was enough to give England a searing headache.

_Would you stop repeating those bloody words? It's like it's pounding in my head! _

_'I'm not repeating anything. You just need to calm yourself down. If you don't want to tell America just yet, then I suggest you do just that since you might attract attention from him, _making _yourself even more suspicious than you already were." _

_How can I? Now I know that there were events in my past that I don't even want to remember, how can I be so calm about that? _

There was no reply.

_You are really no help at all, are you? _

England pushed himself back in deeply into the worn out couch. His headache starting to fade slowly once he started to calm down. His eyes quickly went back and forth to America to see if he was watching at all, luckily for England, he wasn't.

He had a chance to tell America right now. If his past self was telling him the truth, England should be telling him before he remembers anything that could really affect himself.

But he knew America would _not _just take this lightly. Even if England were to tell him part of the truth, he would probably figure the rest out from the other nations.

And Japan and France already told the other nations, making America the only one who hasn't been told, especially when the situation was dealing with him.

He doesn't even know so much about America anyways, England only knew about the tiny details of the nation, but other than that, America was like a stranger he met before.

But what if America doesn't stay with England anymore after he tells him? What if more memories come up when he's telling him and America starts to question more about England?

But what memories was he talking about? The ones he didn't want to remember? What happened between him and America back then? Did it change who they were in the present day?

So many questions ran through England's head, all compiling each other until he couldn't keep them inside his head.

_"Why can't I just tell you?!" _

England immediately clamped his hands over his mouth and started breathing heavily as he was on the verge of praying that America didn't hear his shout.

Shaking, he turned around to face America, who was wide-eyed and standing near the far corner.

"You heard...didn't you?" sputtered England, his eyes now starting to form tears and his lips trembling. America didn't respond, but he took a few steps closer witl shock still appearing on his face.

The Brit didn't know what to say next, his tongue was in knots and it was like his brain had just shut off. Sweat tickled down his forehead and it became apparent that England was in a state of nervousness.

"Iggy, just calm-" America reached out his hand to comfort England, but he quickly slapped it away before America could have the chance to finish.

"Don't tell me to calm down you bloody wanker!" England turned back around so he wouldn't have to face America.

_What am I saying? God, my head hurts..._

"I...I n-need to be alone for a while..." at that moment, England ran up the stairs as quickly as he could, without having to turn back to see if America was following.

England opened his bedroom door and slammed it closed with an echo resounding his entire house.

He crashed on his bed, his tears wanting to fall but they stayed in his eyes sockets. As soon as England heard the sounds of footsteps coming up the stairs, he clamped one of the nearby pillows over his head to get rid of the noise.

And no matter how hard he tried, he could not get rid of the sound of the frantic knocks on his door.

"England! What's going on? What can't you tell me?" America continued to knock on the door multiple times before he heard an answer.

"Look, it's better if you leave, I just need to be alone right now," the voice was faint but it was enough for America to hear.

_'You're supposed to be with him! That's the exact opposite of what you are doing!' _

_"_I'm sorry, but I can't leave! The other countries told me to stay here no matter what! That's why China came all the way here to check on you, he didn't entrust me with the responsibility of watching you!"

The knocking on the door finally stopped. "I can't leave you here all alone! You don't really have a choice in this, but you can at least tell me what's going on, I don't like seeing you in such a wreck,"

There was utter silence. America stayed and held his ear up to the door, checking to see if England was making any noise from the room. All he heard was soft breathing and nothing more.

It seemed like an hour more than a few minutes when none of the nations were speaking.

And America was the one to interrupt the silence. "England, I just want to know what's going on with you, alright? I care for you that much that I want to know..."

The sound of footsteps going down the stairs reached to England's eardrums.

_I have to tell him..._

At that moment, he began to sob until his eyes became heavy and pulled into a sleep.

* * *

**Chapter finished! So England is FINALLY going to tell America in the next chapter or two. I just want to write how America would react to this, but I don't know whether he should take it lightly or not...**

**I've posted a new story called Yao and the Russian and it's basically a parody of Beauty and the Beast (which I have been repeatedly been talking about in the past chapters) and I wish you can read it and see if you guys like it so far!**

**And... Winter Break... I might not be posting a lot during that time since I'll be with family for Christmas and New Years. **

**I'm so tired... I just ran a 5k earlier about a few hours ago, but I ended up getting 5th place in my age division, so I guess I'm happy...**

**Please favorite/review if you enjoyed!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**


	14. Chapter 14

England opened his eyes slowly as he began to wake up. The world around him was a slight blur but he regained normal vision as he got up from his bed.

He remembered what America said last night, and everything he said was true. But the Brit knew those feelings won't last much longer after today.

Speaking of which, he didn't know if America stayed long after yesterday. The nations did order him to keep watch of England, but where would he be?

He only shrugged and walked to exit his bedroom. England knew how much of a mess he looked like, with wrinkled and disorganized clothes, and his blonde hair was more tangled and messier than it already was. Of course he would've fixed it, but resolving matters with America was now on his mind.

Slowly, he turned the doorknob and he could hear the soft creak of the door to open. His hand jerked back as the door pushed back on England and was slammed all the way open. England jumped in surprise as a figure moved lifelessly on its back.

On England's feet was the American sleeping away with his glasses crooked and almost falling to the side, his arms wailing across his chest, and snoring softly without being bothered by the slight fall he took.

England was almost intrigued by the fact that America slept by his door, he stayed all night and probably fell asleep while he was at it. Yet, he could almost feel...happy and shocked that he did so. Which other country would stay by the door for him? All would probably leave after a while if nothing was happening, they wouldn't stay, they wouldn't fall asleep while waiting for a response, no nation would ever do something like that for England.

Except for America.

Except for that country who would do anything that outreaches the limit to protect and watch over anyone who is broken.

And it only made England nervous. Nervous that he would tell him and all of that would dissolve into nothingness.

He continued to watch down at America as he was still drowned in his sleep, his chest moving up and down and air escaping his mouth and back in.

_Well at least he isn't dead. _

The Englishman laughed at himself for that, trying to lighten up the mood before it would get worse later on.

_Should I wake him up? _There wasn't any answer from his past self, he was on his own. _I could, but... _

_No, I have to...this situation isn't going to fix itself if I don't tell him._

England crouched on his knees to bend over and look on top of America. (God, that sentence sounds so wrong to me...now back to story)

Even though he was rolled on his side, England was still able to capture his features. It felt so different to see his appearance while he was sleeping rather than when he was awake. He wasn't so loud with the raucous laughter and his wide mouth now closed. America didn't look so energetic and cheerful now, he just looked serene and peaceful while he was sleeping like that, it almost looked... adorable to England.

_Adorable? Since when would I call the American git 'adorable'? _

That wasn't all England noticed. He noticed that closer on inspection, his features were much more defined than ever. The American's sandy blonde hair looked brighter than ever, except for that strange cowlick on one side, which kind of bothered England a bit.

A few strands of his hair rested on top of his eyelids, which were hiding a clear sky blue underneath. His cheeks were the slightest pink and blended with his glowing skin. He had a pretty strong jaw by the looks of it, and his lips shone a shade of peach.

Now America didn't look adorable to England anymore...

_Why do I have a strong urge to call America beautiful? _

England quickly tried to stray those thoughts aside, but every look and aspect of America made them quickly return. It was almost uncontrollable, but after a while, he didn't mind. Those thoughts slowly became implanted in his mind, like they were always there.

He shuddered at that thought. _Like they were already there..._

_Is this a memory? _

_'Yes, but it deals with your emotions towards America, so now you're going to look at him differently than you did a few minutes ago.' _

_That makes sense, but why no vision? _

_'It's your emotions you bloody git, you can't see them. You feel them.' _

_Nice to hear that from you, wanker. _

No reply was heard.

His past self was right, every time he turned back at America, a new feeling arose within England that he didn't feel before. He could feel his cheeks becoming a shade of pink and his heart beat quickly under his chest. Yet, he didn't understand why he was reacting to him like this, was he like this before the accident?

England started to panic as the American shrugged and rolled on his body and his eyelids began to stutter. The Brit's cheeks were rapidly growing redder by the second. He knew that if he tried to move away, he could make a sound or some noise that could wake America up.

But he was waking up, those eyelids were going to open any second now and England's entire body has went into shutdown. All he could do was wait for him to wake up.

The exotic feeling returned as America opened his eyes. A defiant sky blue struck out and complimented him well. England felt as if he was looking at the sea, but almost neverending inside his eyes.

America rubbed his eyes and pushed himself up from the ground, surprised that his glasses were still in tact after sleeping on England's door. He jerked awake once he saw England by his side.

"England? That's you, right?" muttered America softly as he looked back at England. He must have thought that England was a mere dream, knowing that the Brit wouldn't be doing this because of his situation.

"Of course it is, bloody wanker, and why the hell did you fall asleep by my door? You could've slept downstairs on that couch, or gone back home, I suppose," England crossed his arms over his chest and looked directly at the tired American. He tried to get the strange feeling away, but it only brought his cheeks to a soft pink.

"It's like I said before, I was told to watch over you until further notice, so I..." he crouched his head and looked back up at England with a _you know _look. "I had to, it was my job,"

England squinted his eyes and sadness showed on his face, America could notice, but he didn't want to bring it up. The Englishman sputtered but said in a clear voice. "Yes, but you didn't have to, none of the other countries would've done so,"

"Well, I'm the hero! And the hero is supposed to help out anyone in need, and you happen to be one of those people I help!" he chuckled and smiled back at England.

_But who can help you after I say what I'm about to say?_

"America, I have to tell you something," England's head bowed down so he didn't have to see America's face.

"You can tell me anything, Iggy! So what is it?" He sounded so happy, but there was some disturbance in his voice England couldn't point out.

He knew it. England knew that America noticed that he would say something that America didn't get to know and the other countries did.

England took a deep breath, and his emerald eyes darted directly at his blue ones.

"It's with the accident, and you are not going to like it,"

* * *

**I am sorry, I am sorry, I am sorry. just really, lo siento right here because I was going to make England tell the truth but not until the next chapter. **

**So I am promising you, I WILL make England tell America, and I want his reaction to be good...**

**It is almost Winter Break, and I will try to write this and my other story during that time, but with homework packets and time with family, it might be difficult for me to do so.**

**And do any of you like Pewdiepie? If you do, you are an awesome bro here, and I'm just excited to watch him play The Walking Dead Season 2, and I want to get that game for Christmas maybe...**

**And I will say again, I am sorry... this is more of a transition chapter for the secret to be told...**

**Please review/favorite if you enjoyed!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**


	15. Chapter 15

"What about the accident? It can't be that bad, right?" America said as he leaned on England's bedroom door.

"Depends, I don't remember how you would react to big things yet," England muttered as he hugged his knees and sat besides the wall. He wasn't ready, but he was going to have to tell America sooner or later, and this was the time to do so.

"What do you mean by 'yet'?" America suddenly had full attention on the Brit now. Did that mean he's got his memory back?

England took a deep breath and turned his body to face the nation next to him. "This will be a little hard to explain to you, so pay close attention to what I'm going to tell you,"

America nodded and watched as England finally removed his jacket after wearing it overnight. The American was pushing it back for England to keep on wearing it, but he shook his head.

"Look, I don't need it anymore. Thanks for lending it to me though, quite comfortable actually," With one final nudge, America grabbed the jacket out of England's hand and placed it within his arms.

"Alright, what is it?" declared America as he waited to hear what England never told him.

They stood almost completely still. England didn't have the strength to say it, but he had to pull through. "I know that you've noticed that I've told France and Japan and they went on to tell the other countries, am I correct?" he spoke in a clear voice, but fear struck every word that came out of his mouth.

America only nodded and nudged for England to continue. "I told them about something that happened after I passed out. And in a way, you never made me pass out in the first place,"

He shuddered as he remembered when England passed out that day. He blamed himself for everything that made England lay in that hospital bed, and he would probably never forgive himself for that.

But now that England had just confessed that America caused absolutely none of it, then what did?

"After I passed out, I had a conversation with myself...hard to understand, but I did." He took a quick peek at America, shocked to see him with wide eyes.

"Okay, maybe you just had a bad dream or something-"

"No, I didn't. Let me finish," England raised his index finger up as a signal for America to shut up. Thankfully, it worked on him.

"He told me that he _was _me, or well, a part of me I suppose. He's my memories. The remains of my past, everything that happened back then,"

America narrowed his eyes. "Does that mean he doesn't remember anything too?"

"No, he remembers _everything." _

"Then why not you? If you're the same person, wouldn't you know who I am?"

England started to get nervous. Sweat trickled down his forehead and his hands shook as he thought of anything to say. He almost backed out, but...no. He couldn't stop now, it would cause more questions later.

"He's blocked. Trapped. Because of that, he can't send the memories to me, that's why I didn't know who you were when I woke up in the hospital. At first sight, you were just a random stranger, but in closer inspection, you seemed so familiar to me. I couldn't explain it,"

His mind tried to wrap through all the information England was telling him, but something clicked inside America. Did it mean...

"Does that mean you remember everything now?"

"Yes and no. When I spoke with him, he told me that he can be unblocked. He would be able to transfer a memory to me, but he would be blocked again. The first time this happened was before I passed out, and that was the reason I did."

America started thinking of what he could have remembered. Whatever it was, it shocked him too much to put England into unconsciousness.

"What was the memory about? Was it...bad?" his voice rasped at that last word. For all America knew, England could remember anything. Anything, and they were in that room talking about the revolution that day.

"It was very sudden, I didn't expect it and it drove me to passing out. But no, it wasn't bad. It was..." England stopped and thought about that single memory for a moment.

"It was of me and you, but you were a small child. Once I recognized you right there, I was confused. It didn't make any sense for why I saw you as a child, and the fact I was there, taking care of you, just made my head spin."

He took a sigh of relief, glad that England didn't remember it. Glad that England didn't remember _that, _what happened so many years ago.

"So you get almost paralyzed when you get a memory back?" America ran a hand through his hair, watching England place his elbows on top of his knees.

"Pretty much, and the more time I spend with you, I get more memories of you back," said England in a solid monotone voice. America almost jumped out of joy once he heard that. That meant England would get his memories back, and he would be the one to get them back!

"I can tell you look excited, but there's a reason why I only told Japan and France and not the other countries. They had to tell the rest of the nations because they probably wouldn't react well with me in the room,"

All of the excitement left America's face, drained out like it was never there. "What do you mean?"

England darted his emerald eyes towards America's sea blue eyes, and America could see a spark of sadness inside his eyes. He knew that something was bothering England just by the look of his eyes. "Something is blocking my past self, and I have no control of it whatsoever. Every time I'm with you, it stops blocking my memories and I get to remember you some more,"

"What is it then? Do you know what it is?" shouted America, franticly wanting to know what was this terrible thing that was blocking him away from England.

He stuttered as he spoke those few words. "That _thing... _is _me_,"

America certainly didn't expect that answer to escape from England.

"What?"

"You heard me, I'm blocking him. I don't know why, it's going against my own will. If you didn't notice already, I'm only blocking _you _for some reason. I didn't forget the other nations, only you." England watched as America began to fill up with anger, but he had to tell him the rest. "I'm still not sure why, but my memories told me that I'm not bothering to forget the other countries. Even he doesn't know the reason for this,"

He was stunned to see that America had hot,angry tears falling slowly down his cheeks.

"You're forgot me, only me, on purpose?" his voice held a harsh note to it. England was afraid this would happen, but to just witness it before his own eyes made him scared to death.

"Not on purpose, I never intended to!" England tried to convince America that he never wanted to forget him, but there was no use trying.

"You're the one who's forgetting me anyways, so maybe it was never my fault in the first place," America yelled as he gritted his teeth in anger and a few tears were wiped away quickly so England wouldn't be able to see them.

"Your fault...?" asked England as whispered those words in complete fear.

America stood up and towered over England, who compared to America was a dwarf sitting next to a giant. "I actually thought that this was all my fault. I blamed myself for you laying on that hospital bed. I blamed myself for making you pass out. I blamed myself for you losing every single memory with me. I..."

He stopped for a moment to push back the tears that fell from his blue eyes. The tearful America that England saw when he first woke up in the hospital was nothing compared to the sadness in America now.

"I blamed myself for you almost dying in the accident. I blamed myself for everything until this point. I've made so many mistakes in the past and I'll probably make more in the future, and I thought this was my biggest."

Tears started to pour down England's face with his mouth hung open in shock.

"Turns out, it was my mistake to believe that I was the cause for this mess, while it is really you. I know you didn't mean to, but it's your damn fault we're all in this mess,"

England was speechless, he didn't know what else to say to the nation before him. When he looked back up at America, he turned his back to him and headed down the stairs. The Brit knew he was going to leave, and he began to follow him down the creaky stairs.

"Where are you going?" England shouted before America left through the still-broken door when China entered the household.

America didn't even turn back. "I'm going to talk with the other countries about something, and you don't need to come along. They already knew before me, right?" he gave off a sarcastic chuckle and headed out the door.

"Wait! America, wait!" America didn't stop or slow down at England's voice.

England tried one last time to get America's attention.

"_Alfred, _wait!"

In an instant, America stopped and only turned his head to look back at England. He hasn't heard England call him by his human name in years, and for him to desperately call out for the American at this time, stunned America and left him motionless.

Both said nothing for a few moments, utter silence as the wind passed by.

"I..." America began, "I need to go," he turned back and left England's sight, leaving England stand alone by his broken door.

"I told him, but at what cost?"

He repeated that so many times in his head. At least America wouldn't be able to see the Brit collapse and drop to his knees with sobs escaping his lips and tears falling down to the pavement below.

* * *

**England finally told America after oh so many chapters! **

**But now I feel like some kind of monster after putting both of them through that, especially with England, I shouldn't be this cruel to some of my favorite characters.**

**And for _you _Amy Kitty Katz, I'm sorry that I pushed the reveal of England's secret to this chapter instead of the last chapter, I intended to write it last week, but I had to make a transition chapter if anything else. But at least he told, right? **

**Now America might have a 'little' talk with the nations now because he knows, what could possibly happen? *devious thoughts running through my mind***

**But that might have to wait because, sadly, I might not be writing a lot during Winter Break because I will be with family and actually leaving on a plane tomorrow, again... So the next chapter for this and my other story might be out 1-2 weeks. I'll try to write and post something but it's not likely. **

**Thanks for everybody who has favorited/reviewed/followed this story, it really means a lot to me. **

**Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year to all! **

**Please favorite or review if you enjoyed! **

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me. **


	16. Chapter 16

"It's been a day already, should we call America-san?" Japan said to the other nations as they all sat in silence.

France let out a slight chuckle. "Non, we should leave those two alone while we can! I believe Amerique is getting along with Angleterre quite well, you know?"

China sneared at that perverted thought. "How can you be so sure about that, aru? Who knows if they aren't doing well?"

"Maybe they're doing okay, ve~?" Italy said dozily with a wide grin on his face.

"Ja, but we have to be sure. It's not like we're not able to check up on them once in a while." Germany crossed his arms in small protest as he spoke with a clear and stern voice as usual.

Japan placed his hand on one of his pockets and pulled out his phone. "I'll call, we'll see how they're doing," he dialed America's number and raised the phone to his ears.

The entire room was silent as they waited for America to answer.

And they were startled once they heard a phone ringing in their eardrums.

"Does anyone have America's phone, aru? I could hear it near us," China said as he stood up to hear where the ringing was coming from.

The ringing was getting louder by the second, but along with the phone, there was the sound of footsteps pounding against the marble floor.

"No, he's-" Japan didn't have the chance to finish. He was speechless once he found America bursting through the meeting room doors with his eyes red and swollen from salty tears and his jaw set in a perfect frown.

He was panting, gasping for air but also choking back the sobs in his throat. And all the nations knew the reason why he was here.

England told him, and America didn't take it well. But all the countries wondered, why is he here?

America picked his head up and darted his eyes straight at Japan and France. _"You,"_ he nations stood in shock, they have never seen the obnoxious and confident nation become so serious in a single matter of time.

France was the first to speak through all the tension. "Amerique, we know that you're upset because of Angleterre, but you have to-"

"You're not the one who's being forgotten," tears fell freely down his cheeks. "At least he chose to remember _you _and not _me, _right? Right?"

Everyone was stunned, they didn't expect America to be affected this much.

"And with the fact that England wanted to tell you two first and not to me? For you to tell the others about his little secret? And not me?" America was practically screaming by this point. He flailed his arm towards Russia who was standing peacefully without any consent. "Even that commie bitch knows about it before me!"

Russia gave out a cruel smile, and instantly removed his pipe from inside his coat. "How about you repeat what you just said, da?" he made small footsteps towards the American.

America still wasn't thinking through. "I'll repeat what I said. I said that-" before America could face the Russian face to face, the nations immediately ran between the two world superpowers before things got worse.

"We are _not _having an argument like this again! Both of you know about your cold war, we can't have another one!" Germany shouted as he held back America from getting any closer to Russia, who was being consulted by China so he could calm down. "You two are acting like dummkopfs! Especially you America! This has to do with England, not anything to do with Russia!"

Russia made a devious glare at America. "He is just mad that England trusted us before you. Ever thought of that, little Alfred?"

At that moment, America pushed through Germany with tremendous strength and his knuckles pure white from grasping his hands. "Son of a-" his arms were grabbed on by the nations, all of them struggling to hold the American down with the anger filled inside him.

"America-san! Can't we talk this out without all the fighting?" Japan turned America around so they could face each other.

All he did was squint his eyes in fury at Russia and crossed his arms over his chest as he turned back at Japan.

Japan sighed in slight relief. "Alright, so he told you,"

"Yeah, he did," America growled with a sneer appearing on his face.

He tried to think of anything to say, but what could he do? Japan knew that England would have to tell America sooner of later, but everything now was just sudden, out of the ordinary for the nations in the room.

"Since you have nothing to say, maybe I'll fill it in for you. How does that sound?" America said harshly as he towered over Japan, who was now hopeless at this point. "You and France found out and told everyone else without me. Correct?"

The Japanese nation nodded his head as an answer. "May I ask why you didn't?"

Most of the nations trembled at the question. If America wasn't satisfied with their answer, he would probably snap.

"Angleterre should've been the person to tell you. Not us," France said calmly for America to understand. "It was already difficult for us to tell the others, and it wouldn't feel right for us to tell you,"

"I get it, but maybe you should have told me about it. I would've thought twice about watching over England," America said.

"Would've...thought twice?" France repeated in confusion.

"Before I get to that," America gestured his arm at the other countries. "How did they react?"

The countries blinked in surprise. Surely they have never seen this side of America before.

"They...they didn't warm up to the idea at first, but they got over it. Now we aren't worried about England, we're worried about _you_," France said with a solid and clear voice.

"And why exactly would you be worried about me?"

Japan raised a hand to speak. "You're never like this. And we need you to help us out with England, but you can't do that in this condition you're in,"

"Help him? He's forgetting me on purpose. I know he didn't mean to, but haven't you realized that it's his fault we're involved in all of this?"

"You really think that of Angleterre?" France stood with his eyes widened in shock.

America shrugged carelessly. "Why not? Shouldn't he be the blame for this?" he looked down at the floor. "And I thought I was the blame once again..." he said with malice and despair in his tone.

"He forgot you, but he never wanted to, aru! Why can't you understand that America?" China said in utter frustration.

Water began to form in the nation's baby blue eyes. "I won't understand because I don't know why he forgot me, and only me. There must be some reason as to why."

"We were thinking about that, but England-san would never mean to upset you," Japan said calmly.

"How can you be so sure, Japan?" America asked with his eyes beginning to water even more.

"I'm sure because of it. I'll ask it, was England _afraid _of telling you?" Japan said.

The American paused for a moment. "Yes. He didn't want to tell me at all,"

Japan nodded. "And do you know why?"

He choked out one word. "No,"

"That's right. He didn't want to tell you because he knew that you would be upset. England wanted to keep this from you because he knew that you would leave him," Japan said convincingly.

It somewhat worked on America, he knew that he left England all alone there, but did he really deserve that? Even after this was mostly his fault?

"But you're here, and not with..." Japan didn't complete the sentence, America already knew what he was going to say.

"Does that mean America left England alone at his house?" Italy said with his face unusually containing no smile.

A few nations nodded as a response. America stood there blankly as he realized his actions earlier that day.

"Still, I just don't get why he would forget me. He can't even explain why," America wondered.

"None of us can explain what's happening with Angleterre, but all we could do is wait for his memories to be resurfaced again, oui?" France said reassuringly.

"And long would that take? Days? Months? Years? What if he doesn't get them all back?" America suddenly brought the confidence levels in the conference room down.

"Remember what I told you during the meeting we had after we had visited the hospital?" Japan spoke softly.

Silence. There was no movement in America, not even a single blink.

Japan sighed. "I'll remind you. Make new memories with him, he may have forgotten his past with you but that doesn't mean he'll completely forget you. It will take a while, but a connection would form in that time."

America refused this. "That's not the same England, it doesn't feel like it's him anymore,"

"Then help him become _your _England. Make him the England you first met with," Japan whispered loud enough for America to hear.

"You expect me to do that? How can I?" America questioned.

"Patience and time. That's all," Japan said with a smile appearing on his face.

The nation stood and thought for a while. He knew that Japan was right, but how could he forgive England after what happened?

"I need to go see him," America said as he headed for the meeting room doors.

"America-san, I don't think you should,"

"But, why?" America said with his back still turned back on the nations.

"You're still angry with him, you know that?" Germany said. "England is still saddened because of you, and it isn't a good idea to see him after what you did,"

"How would you know that?" America said to Germany.

China was the next person to speak. "He's right, aru. And besides, I told you about a world meeting before, right? It's tomorrow. You can talk to him then, aru,"

He kept the door open for him to walk out, but he had to see England. He needed to talk to him. Yet America was still angry. It was still England's fault, and he thought that he was the blame, but he was wrong.

"America-san, you can wait till tomorrow's meeting. I'll help if you would like," Japan said.

America took out a deep breath. "Alright, but I want to talk with England alone for a while," Japan nodded as a response and smiled.

"I guess I'll just go home," he closed the door behind him leaving the nations standing in the silent conference room.

Most took deep sighs of relief and others took a seat for relaxation.

"Would they really make up after a meeting?" Italy said with cluelessness in his voice.

"It would help, but not fully, Italy-san," Japan said happily to Italy.

"May I just ask why you wanted to started an argument with America, aru?" China said furiously at Russia. The Russian smiled and let out a creepy chuckle.

"He's a good rival, and it looked like a start of a good fight, da?"

"Try not to do that again at the meeting, aru," China said as he rubbed his hand against his temples.

"Japan, you think things will get better?" France said.

The Japanese man nodded. "I'm sure of it. But England doesn't remember about _that_, right?"

"Non. Not yet. He still doesn't know."

* * *

**I'm back! Did you miss me? I know you did/didn't! **

**Now that I'm finished with my little hiatus, I can write more chapters for both of my stories now! **

**I didn't expect for America to have a 'little' argument with Russia back there, I didn't intend to do so... and Japan and France know that England doesn't have the memories of _that_...so when do you think that it will come back? **

**I hope you all had an awesome Winter Break! And thank you for the reviews/favorites/follows you guys have given me, it really means much to me that you guys are reading the story.**

**I'm sorry if this chapter is rushed or crappy because there were some parts that I feel that don't matter in the plot at all.**

**Please review/favorite if you enjoyed!**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me.**


	17. Chapter 17

America trembled as he walked through the hallways. He could take sight of numerous countries taking notice of him as his body shook from the top of his head to the bottom of his feet, but how can he stop? There was a conference later that morning, and although the American couldn't rest at all that night, he was shaking as if he was stunned by a taser.

Every single nation was informed about England's slight amnesia problem, but weren't told the entire truth. The only other thing they knew was the fact that England was slowly regaining his memories back of America, nothing more.

The halls were surprisingly quiet, the air around everyone droopy as they made their way to the meeting room. Never had they seen the nation in this state, and when a country doesn't act like they usually are, the others keep their mouth shut and try to stay away from the country themselves.

It rarely happens anymore to any nation after most of the war relations have been settled, but America was a world superpower, and something wrong with him can lead to more destruction later to the entire world. Thus, everyone kept their distance.

The trip to the meeting room was somewhat longer than it was to get there, and something didn't feel right. America knew that England may or may not be in his seat in that meeting, maybe not to appear at the meeting itself, surely he wouldn't want to see America again after that night.

He took a few uneasy breaths and gulped all the courage he can to pull off his usual grin once he entered the room. How can he? It's already difficult to think now that America had technically broke England down without any sympathy to him.

The American groaned in frustration. Everytime he thought of anything having to do with England or anything to hurt him only made the nation feel worse than he already was.

Even with all the strength he had, he couldn't enter that room with a simple smile. Not even a proclaim of him calling himself a hero and his arrival. Nothing. Just utter silence and America's failed attempt at a smile turning into a frown.

As he began to walk to his seat, there was one thing that was certain. The chair reserved for England, and England only, was empty.

America stayed silent and rested his head against the hard, cold table. Although it was faint, he could hear several of the nations speaking, and most of their talking had to do with him.

"He's _early? _That doesn't make sense! Isn't America usually late for the world meetings?" he heard Austria say in confusion. Other nations nodded in agreement, they haven't seen America on time for a meeting since...well, really no one knows, he is _always _late. Just not today.

"Mr. America doesn't seem too good at the moment, hopefully he cheers up soon," Lithuania whispered to himself so Russia wouldn't hear.

"Do you know if England will be attending the meeting? America might feel better if he does come," he turned his head to find Canada, his brother, speaking with France. Of course his own brother would notice America in a different manner than usual and try to fix it, but all they could do was wait.

"I don't know if Angleterre is going to arrive at all. I haven't seen him in a few days, and the last person to talk with him was Amerique," he took a quick, saddened glance at America. "Whatever Amerique said, it probably made him feel sad, non? He might not be here after all,"

He turned his head to a clock that was held in place at the very center of the room's walls. It was early that morning, with the handles moving slowly forward. It was only a few minutes until the meeting would start, and they would have to start despite a major country missing.

"Guess the amigo isn't coming at all, you know he doesn't arrive late, so he must be absent this meeting," Spain said with an unusually worried tone. Even though they weren't so friendly centuries ago, he still felt concern for him along with the rest of the nations.

Germany sighed in protest. "Yes, but he is a major country, he shouldn't be missing any of the world conferences, they are extremely important at times and he should hear what the others have to say,"

By now, every country had arrived before the meeting started, with only England as an exception.

"I guess England-san would be missing this meeting for today," said Japan sadly as he walked over to take his seat.

As soon as everyone took their seats, the meeting began with several issues being mentioned from country to country. All America could hear were mumbles, short syllables, and the usual 'blah blah blah' whenever he was bored to death in any meeting that he is in.

America didn't care what they were saying, he wasn't listening to a single word now. He was consumed in his thoughts of England, it was never normal for him to miss a meeting, even when he was sick or not in a good condition, he still insists that he should go.

But no, he didn't attend because of him. Because of America. It was the perfect excuse to why he wasn't here, maybe if France went to visit and check up on England, he would just say he didn't want to _look _at the American.

Beginning to slouch in his chair, America rested his head on his shoulders and found the conference room becoming fuzzy and blurry as he began to close his eyes. He knew that later he would be yelled at by Germany for sleeping during a meeting, but now he was used to it from doing it so many times before.

His eyelids closed for him to find darkness all around, slowly drifting to sleep as he rested on the chair.

The moment America heard the door opening, he thought he fell asleep and was dreaming it.

"Sorry I'm late, I just...got tired..."

Everyone had their eyes on England now, but others who were suspicious took quick glances at America, not knowing how the nation would react to this.

His hair was a bit messier than usual, his emerald eyes showed signs of redness from an over usage of salty tears the previous day. All in all, he looked the same as he was a few days ago. Yet, there was this ounce of dullness in his eyes, sadness, tragedy in them that America could notice right away.

"You're thirty-eight minutes late, I suggest you can take a seat," Germany announced, and England walked over to the nearest empty spot to sit at.

He automatically stopped and froze in his place when the only available spot was the seat next to America.

France stood up without a remark."If you want, I'll switch seats with-"

England raised his index finger to his mouth."No, I'll be fine," he didn't take a single glance back at America. "I was just startled for a moment, that's all," he reassured to France.

America began to feel sweat pricking quickly down his forehead. So many questions and thoughts circulated in his head that he couldn't keep them up all at once.

Did he decide at the last minute to attend the meeting?

Does England want to speak to him or not about what happened that day?

Is he angry? Sad? Okay?

Did England remember anything after he left?

America was almost tempted to tell England whether he remembered something or not, he was right there next to him, he could tell him now and just get it overwith. He could apologize to him, and maybe England would forgive him.

But there was a chance that he might not, and what if England doesn't? Would he even care anymore to regain his memories back of America again?

He couldn't take this anymore, he needed to speak to England whether England liked it or not.

"E-England?" he barely had the strength to whisper his name. America knew that he noticed. He saw him flinch at the sound of his name being called, there was no mistaking it. Yet, it seemed like England was pretending he didn't hear.

"I saw you flinch, England. I know you heard me," He still didn't face towards America, but his face gave away a pained expression with his body shaking for a small moment. Seeing the Brit becoming so miserable just pricked on America's heart, and not saying anything won't fix their problem now.

"Look, I..."America said quietly so none of the countries would hear nearby. "I shouldn't have left you there alone...I just...overreacted back there. I should've thought things through before I left, and I'm sorry for that,"

Still no movement in England, but his eyes were pointed directly at the end of the table. He was listening to America at least, instead of the meeting that he had previously missed.

"England, did you..." America took shuddering breaths before he could finish the sentence. "Did y-you remember anything after I left?"

This time, England blinked in response. He turned his head to face America with a surprised look on his face.

"N-No, not really, but-"

America now had full ears on England, paying full attention to him with no one to take it away.

"I can't help but feel something familiar once you left, I just can't put my finger on it,"

Familiar? America thought about that for a while. _Familiar. _What did that mean?

"I didn't want to go to the conference at first because I thought you would still be angry with me, clearly didn't expect you to even look at me, much rather than to apologize for earlier,"

"But you went anyways, so why?"

"It wouldn't help if I stayed at home, better to actually attend than to miss the meeting itself," England said without any remorse in his voice."Still, something felt off after you left. It's still bothering me and it feels strange, like it only grows stronger as time passes by,"

"I don't understand, if it was familiar, it would mean that it happened-" America stopped himself before he finished.

There was a sudden spark of realization that lit in America.

England was lonely, all alone after America left him once he was told about his little secret. Yet, it was only familiar because that happened before, and England doesn't remember because of his problem. Although America never told him, he knew that England was depressed and nostalgic after he was left all alone all those years ago.

After America had left him.

"America, are you alright?" he heard England say, snapping straight out of his trance.

Panicked, America chuckled to cover his worried face, but it wasn't working. "I just got distracted by the meeting, that's all!"

"Alright, if you say so," England said sarcastically, disbelieving what America had just said, and went on to resume with the meeting.

America couldn't shake the single thought away from him.

_He's going to remember the war. All of it, and then what would he think of me? _

* * *

**England's remembering some things that America might not want him to remember...wonder when that would happen.**

**I feel like I'm making some parts of this story a little bit too dramatic for the characters...I don't know whether I should continue that or not...**

**I've been a little busy with school now since they're starting to give us a lot of homework with so much upcoming tests... so this and my other story might be updating once a week instead of twice a week like the older chapters.**

**But I will still be motivated to write and finish this story no matter what! **

**And thanks for the reviews, favorites, and follows this story has been getting, you all deserve a piece of cake :)**

**Hetalia does not and will never belong to me. **


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